Page 19 of One More Song

Granger and Keith have bottles of beer and they are in the front of the crowd as Millie and I step on stage. I won’t look past them toward the back of the room where Ash sits in a ball cap with Saint beside him. If I do, I will lose my resolve.

The music starts and I recognize Millie’s pick immediately. “Total Eclipse of the Heart.” I smile, grateful that I at least know the words, and I feel the tequila course through my bloodstream as the lyrics pull up on the screen in front of us.

I sing, dancing with Millie and feeling the alcohol in my system. The crowd sings along and I don’t know how I ended up at the Boneyard tonight, but here I am. Letting it all out.

Needing this.

When the song ends we take exaggerated bows and Keith and Granger laugh, telling us we were great.

“Did I earn another shot?” I ask and Millie laughs as the four of us head back to the bar.

The shot feels so good I take a fourth and it’s then I start seeing double. I look to the back of the bar and Ash is still there. He hasn’t moved since I arrived. He could at least come over and say hello. Congratulate me on my performance. It’s a silly thought. I’m drunk. And Ash doesn’t owe me a thing.

He’s nothing to me other than a paycheck. That’s all.

If I think it enough times maybe I’ll believe it.

I try not to look back at him, but I can’t help notice the tension between Ash and the other guys. They’re arguing about something. Finally, it’s Saint who gets up and starts toward me.

“So karaoke, huh?” he says, giving me a dimpled grin.

“So what do you think, am I good enough to join your band?”

He chuckles. “Sweetheart, we’ll let you in the band if you promise to keep baking those apple pies of yours. I swear I’ve already gained ten pounds since we moved in.”

I laugh. “Deal.”

That’s when I notice the gaping expressions on Millie, Keith, and Granger’s faces.

“What?” I ask.

“This is one of the guys living with you?” Millie asks, her voice extra loud even though she’s trying to whisper. Her jaw is dropped. “Do you have any idea who he is?”

“Sorry. I’m being rude.” I make a quick introduction to everyone, but there’s still a stunned silence filling the space between us, and I have no idea why. But I’m a little too tipsy to worry about it.

I glance over my shoulder looking for Ash as someone starts belting out Ace of Base’s “All That She Wants,” but he’s no longer in the booth. But Synn and Dusky are both still in the booth, Dusky looking worried and Synn scowling.

“Landon St. James is living with you?” Granger asks, leaning close, his brows raised and looking at Saint like he’s some kind of national hero.

I give a small frown at Saint, who gives me a dimpled smile like he’s used to all the attention. Maybe I should have googled these guys.

“Is it hot in here?” I say a little too loud. The room spins, and my skin feels tingly. I need to move, and I feel myself pulling away from the conversation, moving to the dance floor.

As I walk away, I hear Millie say something about how if Keith wasn’t here, she’d have Saint sign her tits.

They’re all cracking up and happy, and I hear Granger call me back, but I don’t listen.

I need to dance the alcohol from my system. Thankfully, Granger doesn’t come after me as I snake my way onto the crowded dance floor, and I’m glad. He’s too captivated by Saint. Good. I don’t want his hands on my skin. I want to get lost. Memories of my past flash before my eyes and I blink them away. Mitch holding my wrists so hard they bruise. Mitch telling me I was a shitty lover, a worse wife. Lies and fights and me messing it all up, telling myself it was all my fault. It never was.

But the lies we tell ourselves...they run deep.

The music is loud, and whoever is singing now really sucks but I don’t hear the words I only hear the beat. The thump, thump, thump of the bass and I let it wash over me. I close my eyes and let myself float away.

When a man’s hands run over my bare arms, I flinch. Then I feel the heat of his skin and I know who it is before I’m even spun around and looking at him face-to-face.

Ash snakes his arms around my waist, and I draw in a sharp breath.

I should push him away, but I don’t. Can’t. I lean in. Closer. Feel his hard cock against my belly, and a whimper forms in my throat.

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