Page 65 of In Your Dreams, Holden Rhodes

I shouldn’t be thinking about him like that.

On the other hand, if I got what I needednow, we wouldn’t run into any of those tense situations in the future. A guy couldn’t fuck my life up if we didn’t do anything together. There was nothing in my no-dating rule about not thinking about Holden while I got off.

Besides, men thought about their female friends all the time while they jerked off.

The apex between my legs thrummed at the thought of Holden stroking himself while thinking about me.

He was in my head from the second I clicked the toy on. I let myself run wild, picturing him on top of me, beneath me as I rode him and he gripped my hips with a drugged, hazy look in his eyes. Pressure coiled low in my belly. I pictured his face when he came, wincing as pleasure tore through him while he watched me. My head fell back, eyes closed. I thought about how he had groaned as I tugged on his hair. A moan slipped out of me. I thought about how thick his length was and how the first stroke inside me would burn in the best way. Heat warmed me between my legs and I was a slippery mess as I imagined going down on him, taking his cock between my lips and giving him a long, slow suck as he watched in fascination. Drawing it out to torture him.

I imagined his head between my legs, hands on my thighs to keep them wide. The pressure inside me spilled over and I came, back arching, moaning and whimpering as I worked the toy between my legs, wishing it was Holden. Waves of pleasure rippled through me and I clenched around nothing.

When it subsided, I lay back, catching my breath and gathering my scrambled, sluggish thoughts. My heart pounded against the front wall of my chest.

Wow. I had emptied the tank on that one. I sighed and sunk into the pillows.

There. Now, nothing would happen between Holden and me in real life.

As I drifted off to sleep, I realized something.

The way Avery and Hannah and even Olivia talked about Holden, it was clear they didn’t see the calm, relaxed guy I saw today in the forest, talking about paintings and life. On dates, he had nothing to talk about because all he did was work. He never met anyone because he was stuck in this cycle of work, gym, and bar. Rinse, repeat. He needed a shove outside his comfort zone.

I smiled to myself as the idea formed in my head. If there was one thing I was good at, it was having fun. That’s how I could help him.

I was going to teach Holden how to have more fun.

25

Holden

The next weekend,I woke up with my hand on my cock, the sheets tangled around my hips, and Sadie’s name in my mouth. The memory of her warm curves pressed into me weaved through my sleep-hazed head as I stroked, half-conscious.

I couldn’t stop thinking about my fuckingmatchmaker. She had zero interest in dating, zero interest in living in Queen’s Cove, and now she had her dream job waiting for her back in Toronto. I’d heard her telling Olivia about it at the bar the other day, all excited and giddy, showing her photos of Claire’s past projects.

This place was a pitstop for her.

Her on top of the bar flashed into my head and I groaned. Fuck, she had looked so hot up there.

One last time, I told myself as I worked my length, picturing the swell of her tits as she writhed with the music. Guilt wrenched through my chest. I shouldn’t be jerking off to her. Pressure coiled at the base of my spine. This was the last time I’d think about her while doing this because I didn’t want to get used to it.

The last time.

I pictured her in the bed with me, and instead of my hand, it was hers. Her eyes flicking between my length and my face as I watched, helpless and in awe of her. Her thick, shiny hair would cascade over her shoulder and I’d wrap the length of it around my fist.

God, she was fucking gorgeous.

My groan moved up through my chest as I came, spilling over my hand and tensing hard. I exhaled heavily and sunk back into bed to catch my breath.

No more thinking about Sadie naked. No more thinking about us in bed together.

Now that was done, I could focus on women who were available.

* * *

It tookme an hour to write an email that morning.

Saturdays were my most productive day. The office was empty and quiet and distractions were at a minimum. It was the perfect time to focus and get work done.

My mind wandered to Sadie and the inn, and for once, the silence in the office suffocated me.

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