Page 15 of Shaped By Darkness

Who am I to say they're wrong? For years, they've seen people they know and love turned into mindless killing machines that they've had no choice but to put down.

It was kill or be killed, and they did what they thought was best not only for themselves but for the rest of the kingdom.

What we're asking for is to find a way to save Lyle, which means every one of those deaths would have been for nothing.

It's weighing on all of us.

Nobody wants him to be lost, but as the days stretch on, it's hard to believe anything else is an option.

It’s weighing on Serena more than the rest of us—everything is.

Day by day, I see her shrinking back into herself, and there's not a damn thing I, or anyone else, can do about it.

At least not if you ask Garrett and the Queen, but there is one person who thinks he can be saved.

“So, if nobody’s ever been saved, why would Ryker tell Serena that all wasn’t lost?”

The Queen pauses, and for the first time since meeting her, she looks unsure.

She looks at me, her lips pulled down in a frown that tells me everything I need to know, before she turns to Serena, and I see her eyes soften. “I don’t know.”

It’s not the answer she wants to give us, and not the one Serena wanted. Just a few weeks ago, Serena would have taken the Queen's word as law, but not now, not with this.

Without a word, Serena stalks away. Everything in me tells me I should follow her, but I don’t. Ever since we returned to the castle without Lyle, Serena's been different... distant. I try to be there for her as much as I can, but right now, there isn't much we can do, and pushing her doesn't seem to be helping.

If anything, it might do more harm than good right now. This change was hard for us, but I can't imagine how it must be for her.

She blames herself for all of it.

The Queen watches her go, her shoulders sagging as she lets out a sigh.

“I know it’s not what she wants to hear, but we’ve tried everything, and nothing has ever brought anyone back after Draven infected them. It wasn’t for a lack of trying. We tried everything for years.” Her eyes never leave Serena, but I don’t think she’s really seeing her. No, right now she’s far away in a memory that haunts her. “The most we can do is put him in the cells.”

I know she’s trying to help. Even though we’re looking for the impossible, she’s still trying, and someday Serena will appreciate that, but right now…

Right now, she won’t take anything less than a cure for Lyle. There’s no way she’s going to give up on him, which means I can’t either.

“She won’t give up on him, and I think we both know the cells won’t hold him, your Majesty.” I don’t feel I need to explain that Serena wouldn’t accept that, at least not for long.

Even if we could get him in a cell, and that's a huge if, I can't help but feel like it would only put Serena in danger. We couldn't keep her from going down to see Storm, and Lyle will be no different.

The problem is, I was positive Storm wasn't a threat. I have no doubt Lyle is.

“No, the cells wouldn’t work, not with Serena.” Her words sound stern, but the smile on her face is fond. “Please call me Rosalynn. No more of this Queen or Your Majesty nonsense.” I open my mouth to refuse the way I have countless times now. Something about using her first name feels too personal, a right I have yet to earn.

She waves me off, unwilling to have me deny her again.

“Serena is like a daughter to me, but even if she weren’t, you’re sharing a mate with my son. You’re all practically family and will one day help him rule this realm.”

She might not be Serena’s biological mother, but looking at her, it’s impossible to miss their similarities, especially with how stubborn they both are.

Despite feeling unworthy, I smile and give her a slight bow of respect before heading after Serena.

Like Rosalynn, I have no doubt Serena will also be a wonderful queen.

Sleep eludes me most nights, but since losing Lyle, it's gotten worse. Serena doesn't often sleep; instead, she tosses and turns before going to sit by the window and read until the sun comes up.

The first few nights after Sol woke, she fell asleep in his arms. It was the most sleep I'd seen her get since we came back, but it didn’t last long before the nightmares returned—nightmares that she seems determined to face on her own.

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