Page 75 of Push

“Gwen!” A hand waved in the distance. “Over here!”

Toby was impossible to miss. I wrestled the ache in my chest as I watched him jog over. He could look as handsome as he pleased in his white T-shirt and navy shorts. He could beam his big smile. It wouldn’t work. My heart was a cold lump of ice.

He bounced to a stop in front of me. “You came!” His brows furrowed.

In the past, this would’ve been when he dipped me into a hug or planted a deliberately obnoxious kiss on my cheek to force a laugh out of me. No longer options. Instead, he stuffed his hands in his pockets, hiked his shoulders up around his chin, and attempted another smile.

I nodded my hello.

I wasn’t ready to match his goofball grin. I couldn’t force a reaction at all. Sure, I’d agreed to meet up. We were long overdue for a talk.Thetalk. But being friendly and acting like a couple in public didn’t feel right. Not yet. Maybe never.

Toby peeked over my shoulder into the stroller. “Geez, NoBo’s cute, huh?” He bent down, his big hand curving over Noah’s round belly. “Hey, little dude.”

Noah didn’t stir from his afternoon nap. His tiny fists stretched above his head, and his perfect plump mouth had parted just enough to huff sleepy breaths.

Toby straightened up, brushing my shoulder with a hesitant touch as if he was unsure he could. “Missed you, doll.”

I glanced from the corner of my eye.Oh, God.His lips headed for my cheek. It was an instinct for him—an affectionate afterthought I used to welcome with a smile and a playful rebuke. Not this time. I jerked back. I absolutely wasn’t ready for kisses.

Toby’s smile disappeared. “Sorry,” he muttered, his hand falling from my shoulder. “I’m set up just over here.” He pointed to a plaid blanket just off the path. A woven basket rested in the center. He bounded over to it, eager to coax me to join him.

“You organized a picnic?” I flipped the stroller’s brakes with the toe of my sneaker.

“You used to like outdoor time after being cooped up in the office all week.” He shrugged like it was no big deal. “I thought it might be nice.”

“You went to a lot of trouble.”

He blinked up at me with too much fragile hope. An emotionless shell stared back at him. My heart was intent on keeping him at the safest distance possible. Uncomfortable, he dropped his gaze to the basket, and out came a few containers stuffed with food and—God help me—a bottle of non-alcoholicprosecco. I’d rather join the ducks and sip the water from the pond at the bottom of the hill.

“It’s no trouble,” he said. “What else am I doing?”

I glanced at Toby’s right hand. The skin over his knuckles was broken and red.

What else, indeed?

“You, um… wanna sit down?” He patted the blanket beside him, offering a cautious smile that faltered when I curled into the corner, just out of his reach. He masked his disappointment by rummaging in the picnic basket again. An enormous bunch of bananas appeared.

I arched my eyebrow. “That’s alotof bananas.”

“They’re for NoBo. I wasn’t taking any chances after World War Fruit.”

“World…War…Fruit?”

“Let’s just say I learned the hard way that blueberries are out, and bananas are in. Don’t worry. Zoo food isn’t the only thing on the menu. I’ve got some classier options for us.”

“Like the, uh…prosecco?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “All the tips I read online suggested champagne for a picnic, but you’re still breastfeeding, so…” A shrug. “Is the prosecco no good?”

“Have you tasted it?”

“Uh…”

“You should give it a try.” My lips curled up. “It’s num nums.”

Suspicion narrowed Toby’s eyes. “That’s what you say when you try to get NoBo to eat that gross-looking green stuff.”

“Creamed spinachisnum nums.”

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