Page 99 of Push

Things weren’t back to normal. This had never been our normal. This was better.

And the saddest part was that I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so happy. I had to live through one of the worst nights of my life to feel like half a person again. I hated that more than anything.

But I couldn’t keep looking behind me to remember what Toby and I could have been, only who we were now. And we were…good.

We were so good that I caught myself humming as I floated around the kitchen later that night, choosing nibblies to arrange on the wooden charcuterie board for our first hangout in over a year.

Marnie wasn’t sure what to make of the new version of me. She sat on the kitchen stool, her jaw on the floor.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I’m better than okay. Noah’s thriving. My second week at work is done and dusted, and as an added bonus, I haven’t murdered Liam yet.” I stuffed another few wedges of cheese on the board. You could never have too much cheese, right? I stepped back to give my masterpiece a final check. “Mar, what do you think—more olives? Oh! I almost forgot.” I rushed back to the pantry. “I’ve got these amazing gherkins.”

Marnie made a face like she wasn’t excited about the gherkins. She should be. I wasn’t kidding about how amazing they were.

“Toby got them for me at the market.” I held up the bottle. “Look. They’re teeny! Adorableandyummy. I’ve gone through two jars already.”

Marnie’s eyebrow arched. “Are yousureyou’re okay? Has working for the blond guy finally broken you?” She jabbed a paint-stained fingernail at the vase of white roses on the counter. “Or is he the one spoiling you with all the flowers?”

“Oh, those?” I waved her off because it was no big deal. “Toby got those.”

Frowning, she opened her mouth, about to say something, but she was interrupted by Toby’s call from the living room.

“Pizza’s here!”

Carefully, I edged the charcuterie board off the counter and was rushing out to the living room when Marnie’s hand darted out to catch my wrist.

“Are yousureabout this?” she asked.

I rolled my eyes. “It’s just nibbles and board games.”

“No, it’s not. It’s you and Toby beingyou and Toby.”

“It’s not—we’re not—” I cleared my throat, but it was like a rock was wedged so deep I couldn’t get any more words out.

Were we acting like we were a couple again?

Maybe.

Hosting nights like thiswassomething we used to do. We’d have friends over, serve too much food and booze, kickeveryone’s ass playing games, and laugh all night until we fell into bed together to celebrate our victory. Toby liked winning. Alot.

“Gwen, he’s basically living here again. We’re hanging out on a Friday night like we used to, and you’ve been dancing around this kitchen humming like a dude who got laid for the first time.” She frowned at me, but she wasn’t angry, just worried. “Are you taking Toby back?”

My gaze dropped to the board. It was the safest place to look. I wasn’t sure if the answer to her question was yes, but I wasn’t sure it was a hard no, either. I bit down on my lip.

Marnie sighed. “Look, I love that big knucklehead. We’ve been friends for a long time, and I know he’s a great guy. But none of that changes the fact he cheated on you. I’ll support your decision no matter what, but don’t take Toby back just because it’s easier. He’ll be great with Noah if you aren’t living together. Hell, he’ll probably still come around and fix up the house. He’s just that kind of guy.” Her tone serious, she rested her hand on my shoulder to really ram home her point. “Be selfish for once and protect yourself, okay? Promise me.”

My smile was shaky. “Promise.”

I propped the charcuterie board on my hip to get a free arm around Marnie’s shoulders. This was definitely the time for a hug. She squeezed back and then smacked my ass to get me moving out of her way. She scooted off the stool, and the bottle of red wine and two glasses disappeared off the counter on her way out the door.

Toby was flipping open a pizza box when we wandered into the living room. “So, ladies, what’s our game of choice tonight?”

Marnie slid the bottle of wine onto the coffee table. “I’ll defer that question to my lawyer.” She flicked two coasters next to the bottle, and the glasses landed on top.

Toby’s grin only got wider. “An excellent strategy.” He reached over to take the charcuterie board from me. For a second, I thought he was going to kiss me, but he jerked back, and flustered, his cheeks darkening, he eased the board onto the coffee table. “Looks like you get the honor of picking the first game, doll.”

I crouched to check the stack of board games Toby had piled on the floor. My eyes lit up. I saw the perfect choice hidden at the very bottom.“Clue!”

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