Page 90 of Rudra Nandani: The Saga of Control And Seduction

“Are you okay?” I inquired right away. She gulped visibly, and blinking, she nodded lightly.

“What do you mean, if she is okay or not?” Maasi maa asked in a firm tone. I stood up and offered my hand to her. She stood up holding my hand, and I looked at Maasi maa walking near us, saying,

“She must know how to behave with a king,” she said politely but sternly. I didn't know why, but that stung me.

“What wrong did she do, Maasimaa?” I asked in a low tone. Nandani adjusted her clothes and hair, and I saw Maasimaa smile at us.

“You both are a king and queen now. Your time is an asset to this empire’s people. Rather than spending it on your joys, you should use it to prosper our kingdom. And, let me remind you, Rudra, what your mother wanted for you. She wanted you to be a dutiful king, someone for whom nothing comes over the people and their welfare, even if it costs you your happiness,” she said, and Igulped, unable to agree with it anymore.

“But, Maasi maa, what’s wrong with Nandani’s behaviour? And I don't understand how spending some quality time with my wife is hampering my duties towards my kingdom,” I questioned, and she frowned at me, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Oh well, if his majesty doesn't see a problem in it, then it might not be wrong because it's pretty clear it is already right in your eyes. And now, any explanation or suggestion wouldn’t matter because you already have an opinion. So yes, it’s not wrong,” she said. My justification clearly hurt her.

I inhaled a deep breath.“No, Maasi maa, that’s not what I meant. You know me better than I do, and please don’t address me so formally. You’re like my mother and will always be, and I’ll always be your Rudra,” I said. My voice wavered by the end because of overwhelming emotions, because I couldn't ever see her hurt.

“I think I should leave now,” Nandani interjected and left the room silently.

“Rudra, you remember what Guruji said, right?” she began after Nandani left.

“I do, Maasimaa, and I’m trying my best not to let Guruji’s words turn into reality.” She lowered her gaze.

“You know me, Rudra. I don’t have children, and I have dedicated my entire life to raising you three. When Surgami Dev threw you three out of the Kingdom after your mother's demise, I took you under my shelter, worked tirelessly, day and night, to fulfil the responsibility of fostering you. And, it’s no secret what kind of work I used to do to earn. I did everything so I could bring food to all your plates. Just imagining you three falling back into the same pit of misery, it’s worse than a nightmare for me.” She grew emotional; tears welled up in her eyes.

“I have no problem with her, but trust me, these people… these people of Mahabaleshgarh are so self-centred. Her father used me like an object, doing whatever he wanted to do to me, and I bore all of it with a stiff lip. But when he found Abhishree, Nandani's mother, he expelled me like a fly out of milk without compunction. I felt like I was nothing but a toy for him at that moment. I felt so envious, so insecure seeing him suddenly so close to his wife, whom he married forcibly, because he didn't want her to marry your father. In the name of love, he satiated his ego by ruining so many lives. Mine, Abhidev’s, Abhishree’s, and your father's lives. The love they‘oh so’proudly call divine and beautiful, that very love made them so selfish, they didn’t give two thoughts about people’s emotions and life,” she finished, her cheeks stained with tears streaming down her eyes. I stepped closer to her and hugged her.

“I know Maasi maa, I know everything. Please don't cry. I’ll never let myself fall into their trap or anyone’s. I know how hard you’ve worked for us to pamper the three of us. We are where we are now because of you. I promise I’ll never let you down,” I tried to console her, and she said.

“I know Nandani is your wife, and I have nothing against her. However, you must focus on your goal. Surgami Dev Singh and Rajvardhan are still alive. You know what you have to do,” she reminded me, and I nodded, closing my eyes.

“I know, Maasi maa,” I said, inhaling deeply.

She pulled away from the hug and said,“May God bless you with my share of happiness, too.” I smiled weakly, and she walked out of the room, patting my cheeks.

Once she left, I knelt on the floor, palming my face to contain myself.

All the memories of the time rushed over in my mind, when on nights we used to sleep on empty stomachs, the days we spent labouring so hard to afford one time’s meal. Tears blurred my vision but cleared my thoughts. Maasi maa was right. Maybe, with Nandani, I was forgetting why I had come so far. I was deviating from my goal’s track.

I felt a storm building inside me, which was making me insanely mad.

On one hand, I wanted to be with Nandani, living life and embracing happiness, but my rage, hatred, and past were driving me down the path of revenge. I sought to avenge my father's death, which led to my mother’s death and caused us three to suffer throughout our lives.

I was certain about one thing: that both options wouldn’t go hand in hand. I could either avenge my father's death or live happily with Nandani. I knew that if I killed Nandani’s father, she would never accept me back. Not killing her father meant that my revenge would remain incomplete, which meant all our suffering would have been in vain.

Rubbing my face, I raked my fingers through my hair. I was caught in an emotional maelstrom. I wanted to scream so bad, but I couldn't.

Leaving Nandani meant hurting her, which I couldn't. Not anymore. She left her everything for me, and my heart wanted her. It would've been futile if she had been at the cost of it.

With a weary sigh, I stood up and went to the bathing room in our chamber. Since we had guests present, I thought bathing in the servants’quarters wouldn't be appropriate. Entering the dressing room, I selected my clothes.

“Ranaji,” an attendee's voice caught my attention, and I turned around to look at her.“Yes,”

“Do you want us to prepare for your bath?” She asked, and I shook my head.“No, just ensure the pool is full.”

“Yes, Ranaji, the pool is full,” she said.“Alright, thank you,” I replied, and she left from there.

I strode into the bathroom and took a quick bath.

Wearing my clothes, I went to the dressing room, where I saw Nandani standing in front of the mirror, drying her hair with the assistance of the attendees.

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