Page 39 of Only Temporary

But when he climbs out of what I’m assuming is an Uber, I actually feel my mouth water. Damn, he looks good. Far too good. He’s wearing a nice pair of jeans and a black button-down shirt that’s rolled up to his elbows, showing off the tattoo he has on his forearm—very pretty, thorny roses on the inside of his arm. The thorns wrapping all the way around. It’s intricate and beautiful.

His dark hair looks like it might have a little bit of gel in it, and he’s cleanly shaved. I walk over to him, and okay, nerves. Mine are at an all-time high right now as I approach.

“Hey.” Okay, his smile is killing me. It’s perfect. Full lips quirked in a smile I know takes a lot to earn. Nice teeth—he’s smiling big enough for me to actually see.

“Hi. Were the kids okay with you leaving?”

He grins. “Yeah, they couldn’t have cared less.” He pushes his hand through his hair and then drops it, probably not wanting to mess it up. As if he could. “Tatum was another story.”

My smile drops at that. “He didn’t want you to go?”

He laughs and then holds his hand out for me. I take it far too excitedly and let him lead me toward the restaurant. “No, it wasn’t that,” he answers. “He was just grilling me about thechickI’m going on a date with.”

“Oh,” I say with a smile and then check in with the hostess with our reservation. “I’m guessing you aren’t ready for that conversation?”

I start to follow the hostess when she goes to seat him, but he stops me, his hand in mine still. “Does that bother you?”

“What?” I can tell the hostess is getting annoyed with us not following her, so I give his hand a little tug. “No, of course not. You’re still figuring that part out. It’s not up to me when or if you have that conversation with anyone,” I say as we’re seated and handed menus.

The hostess takes off, but Kellan’s eyes never leave mine. The guy is intense, and I can’t look away from him either. “I’m not figuring out that I’m attracted to you. I want this date.” It’s like he needs me to know that. And okay, yeah, that’s a little bit of a relief.

It’s not like he’s desperate for a date—he’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on. I know he can get laid if he wants to, but for whatever reason, he chose to go out with me.

We order and then go back to the conversation effortlessly when I say, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“You didn’t,” he says easily. “I just need you to know that. I don’t have a lot of free time, and I know you don’t either. I know it’s complicated with us, but I’m all-in. It’s not an experiment or just wanting to get off.”

Phew.My cheeks heat with that because getting off with Kellan kind of melts my brain a little bit. Okay, a lot. I want to touch him so badly, but I take a sip of my water instead and nod my head. “I want to be on this date too.”

His smile is devastating. “And as far as telling Tatum that I’m dating a guy instead ofsome chick, I’ll get there. I just don’t feel like I need to explain myself.”

“You’ve really never had feelings for a guy before?”

He shakes his head and takes a sip of his water. “I’m not sure I’ve ever had feelings foranyonebefore, period.” That makes me sad for him, and I think it must show on my face. “Don’t worry. I’m not totally dead inside.”

I roll my eyes. “I know that. I can see how much you love your siblings.”

His lips thin, but he gives a clipped nod. “I do. But I didn’t do so great at showing that.”

“That’s really not true, Kellan. You’re there for them now.”

“I should have been there long before.” I hate the guilt he still holds onto, but I don’t think it’s going anywhere anytime soon. “Great first date conversation, am I right?” He’s mocking himself, but for me, it is.

“I like getting to know the person I’m dating.”

“You said you’ve been hurt before...” I swallow hard. And okay yeah, it’s harder when the tables are turned on me. I’m not really used to talking about myself, if I’m honest.

“Hasn’t everyone?”

He’s studying me closely, probably a little frustrated with my nonanswer. Our food comes, and we start to eat a little, but his question still sits there between us.

I lick my suddenly dry lips and shrug. “I haven’t had the best luck with men. I tend to...” How do I say this without offending him. Kellan already thinks he’s broken, I don’t want to add to that. “I date assholes. Well, most of the time.”

“Why?” He looks horrified by that, and I can’t help but chuckle.

“Well, not on purpose.” I laugh lightly and take a sip of my water. “I just seem to go for the type who seem like they need...” I meet his eyes, knowing I need to be honest, but sure I’m going to screw this up. “My help.”

He nods his head knowingly. “Ah. The fixer-upper boyfriends.”

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