Page 2 of Burn It Down

His little body cuddles against mine as he lets out a harsh sob into my neck, and I feel the wetness from his tears. “You died.”

“No, buddy.” My heart feels worse than any other part of me at the moment. Just ripping in half right in my chest. “I didn’t die.”

He pulls back enough so I can see his scrunched-up face, tears running down his cheeks. “You did. Angelica said.”

I curse internally, even knowing that’s likely not exactly what she said. But she didn’t assure him that I was fine. He spent all day worrying about me, and I feel horrible about it. But I can’t quit. It really is all I know. It’s all I’m good at. The best way to support Elijah.

“I’m okay,” I try to comfort him, holding onto him and letting him nuzzle into my neck. I can see my sister’s face—feel her irritation and fear—but I can’t tell her I’ll move to Oregon, and I can’t tell her I’ll quit my job.

Because I can’t do either. I’m meant to be here in Kansas.

I’m meant to be a firefighter.

But I might have to make some sort of change—one I’m not sure I’ll actually like, but it might be necessary, because I can’t put Tori and Elijah through this again.

CHAPTER ONE

“Dad!”Oh no.I shoot off the couch, flinging the blanket off me, and head toward the back of Bowen’s house where the guest room is—the one Bowen set up for my son, Elijah.

I couldn’t quit being a fireman, but I did choose to leave the city life behind and move back to Garnett with Bowen—working at the same firehouse as he does. I haven’t actually had my first shift yet—apparently, I needed to take some time to heal a little after falling through the floor.

It hasn’t been an easy four months.

Especially since my kid hasn’t adjusted well at all. Although, I don’t think it’s the move that has him so upset. He and Bowen get along really well, which makes sense because my older brother is still a kid himself. And Bowen did a great job converting his guest room into a kid’s room with some toys, a twin bed, and even some racecar curtains. He even painted the walls blue.

I open the door to the bedroom and see Elijah sitting up in his bed, his blond hair a total mess and his bangs stuck with sweat against his forehead. “Daddy.”

I go right to him, sitting on the bed and pulling him into my arms. “I’m here.”

“You died.” No matter how many times he says those words, they still send a chill through my entire body.

“I didn’t,” I try to reassure him and kiss his temple, hugging him tight to me. “I promise you I’m here, and I’m okay. We’re okay.”

He just hugs me tighter, with his little arms around my neck and his tears falling down his cheeks. “You did die. Angelica said so.”

“She just didn’t know if I was okay. But I am, Elijah.” I pull him back just a little bit, so I can look into his eyes. They’re rimmed in red, and he looks so tired for only being six. I hate myself for putting him through this. “I’m okay.”

He sniffs, his hands going to my face as if he’s trying to study every feature of my expression. “Don’t die again.”

I nod, my chest aching with his fear. “I won’t. I promise. And remember why we moved here?”

He nods once but doesn’t release my face. “Because it’s safer.”

I hug him to me, and he wraps his arms around me again, letting go of my face. “It is. Aunt Tori even thinks so, and you know how much she worries.”

That finally gets a little snicker from my son. The sound lights up my insides, a sense of brief relief going through me and giving me a little bit of hope that it’ll be okay. “She worries a lot.”

“She does, but she was happy about this move.”

And she actually was. I didn’t think she’d be so happy for me to move Elijah to our hometown, but she said, and I quote, “Even though Bowen is a total idiot, I know you two will be in good hands.” So we moved here with Tori’s blessing.

“You okay, buddy?” I ask, pulling back to look at his face. He’s calmed considerably and nods his little head, falling back down onto his pillow.

“Tired.”

I smile at that and stand up, pulling the covers over his little body. “I love you. Get some sleep. Only good dreams.”

He nods, but his eyes are already closed, and I think he’s out before I make it to the door. I close it gently behind me and then nearly lose my shit when I bump into my brother, who was lurking in the hallway.