Page 114 of Sweet Shots

“Yes, sir. Just on the end over there, if you’d like to take a look. It’s unlocked.”

I move to the very end and find the other grey one, opening the door. Fuck, that’s nice. Much nicer than I expected it to be. It looks great with the grey and it’s a nice surprise.

“I prefer the red myself, but blue is nice as well.”

“This is gorgeous,” I say, running my hand along the seat. “Definitely this one.”

“Perfect. If you’d like any additions, it’ll have to be sent in—”

“I’ll take it as is.” I turn to him and raise a brow. “You’ll take my car off my hands, I’m assuming?”

“Of course. If you’ll follow me back to the front, I’ll get the paperwork going.”

A little over an hour later, I’m driving out of the lot in my brand new BMW. And I won’t lie, it has a smile on my face. I head back to my side of town, taking the long stretch of roads to break her in. The windows are open, and I breathe in the fresh air and turn the music up. I drive for hours and hours until it’s dark, and when I get home, my mood instantly changes. The high from the new car is gone, and there’s a heavy, sad blanket covering me again. What am I going to do now?

I slam the door closed, yanking theFor Salesign from the ground and snapping it over my knee. I toss it into the trash bin on the way inside.

Nothing is going to make this anger go away but him, but it’s obvious he isn’t coming back. So now what? I’m just going to be an angry prick for the rest of my life? This is fucking bullshit.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Mikah

Today is the day.

The worst day of my life.

It hasn’t happened yet, but I’m certain by the end of it, it’ll feel that way. But I have to do this.

Ever since Dominic left, I’ve done a lot of thinking. Yes, I always do a lot of thinking, but this was… different. Reflective. Beneficial. It wasn’t all negative, though some of it was. Okay, maybe a lot. I tried my hardest to not fall into the dark pits of bad thoughts. Through it all, I came up with three things.

One: I need to get away. So, I did. I took a vacation and my god, was it amazing. It was perfect and gave me exactly what I needed to get my head clear. The only thing that sucked about it was that Dominic wasn’t there, but I needed that. I can’t think clearly with him in front of me—funny considering I always thought I was thinking clearly with him there. I guess that’s only true for things that don’t have to do with him. Two weeks in thehot Florida sun, despite it being November because yeah, it was still warm, did wonders for me.

Two: I miss Dominic. I’m sure that was obvious from me wishing he was with me on my vacation, but I know for sure now that I actually miss him. It isn’t just me relying on him or being dependent or whatever other toxic shit I was worried about. I miss him in a healthy way.

Three: I need to face my mother. Yeah, that was a shock to me too. But that’s why today is going to be a horrible day. I’m not sure what I’m going to say to her. Hell, I don’t even know if she’s going to know who I am, but I have to do this. I have to try. I have to do something to put this to rest. Say goodbye to her for the final time. I didn’t do that when I left before, and maybe some part of me needs that closure. Like how people have funerals when someone passes away. I need a funeral for mine and my mother’s toxic fucking relationship. Only then will I be able to move on and figure out what to do in life.

Honestly, how I managed to be here this long and not run into her is a miracle. I’d asked Zach if she was still alive more than once, and he assured me she was. I guess it isn’t all that surprising that I haven’t seen her when I hardly leave. She lives on the other side of the trailer park, and she rarely leaves.

I head out the door just as Zach is coming up the steps.

“Hey,” he says. “You heading over?”

I run a hand through my hair. “Yep.”

He gives me a sad smile and nods. “You need this.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re right.”

“Just do me a favor and don’t run off if shit goes bad. Come back here.”

I grin. “And to think you threatened to kill me if I didn’t leave.”

He rolls his eyes. “Keep talking shit and see what happens.”

“I’m terrified,” I say sarcastically as I move past him. “If I’m not back in an hour, call the cops.”

He chuckles as he goes inside the trailer. I’m not kidding though, and I hope he knows that. I walk toward the back of the park, passing crater-sized potholes and enough stray cats to fill a shelter. Honestly, I’m not sure all of them are cats. There could be skunks and raccoons mixed in there too, but I’m not sticking around to find out. The quicker I get to my mother’s, the better. I need to get this over and done with so I can move on with my life.

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