Page 115 of Tobias

“Please, don’t go,” he pleads, eyes red and watery.

How dare he ask me that?

I shake my head, trying to go around him. I have nothing to say to him. He moves in front of me, blocking my path. “Please, Tobias. Please don’t leave.”

“Move,” I grit out, looking at the spot beyond his ear because I can’t look at him in the face.

I can’t believe he lied to me.

I can't believe Ibelievedhim.

“Please,” he chokes out. “I can explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain,” I growl. “I… trusted you,” I hiss, hating how weak I sound—hating how much this hurts.

I truly thought Brandon was the only person who could hurt me. I didn’t think Theo would ever do this, but… he’s been lying to me this whole time. He’s been cheating this entire time, even though he knew how I felt about it. I opened up to him about what happened with my parents, the only person I ever told, and this is how I’m treated in return? I'm disgusted.

“Tobias—”

“No!” I shout, moving closer to him. He takes a step back, cowering. “I refuse to be your dirty little secret.”

“You’re not!” he shouts back. “You’re not, Tobias. You’re the only thing that has ever felt right.”

I shake my head, trying to move around him again, but he won’t let me. I’m trapped in this damn room because he won’t let me leave. My hands itch to throw him out of the way, but I won’t put my hands on him. I won’t hurt him like that. I’d rather jump out the window than touch him again, for any reason.

“I’ve n-never felt this way before,” he says quickly, his cheeks stained with tears. He swipes at them but they keep pouring out of his beautiful green eyes. “I can breathe when I’m with you. You’re it for me. You, Tobias. It’s you. Please don’t leave. I will do anything. Just… stay with me. Let me make this right.”

I take a step back, then look right into his watery eyes. “You don’t get to say shit like that after what you did. You get to go back to your perfect little life in the wake of this mess, while I’ll be picking up the shattered pieces of my heart for the rest of my goddamn life.”

I shove past him at that point, knowing it's my only option, going right for the front door. From the corner of my eye, I see Biscuit watching, confused. It hurts my heart knowing I'll never get to see that sweet girl again. I should take her with me. Theo doesn't deserve her.

The rain is so heavy I can’t see two feet in front of me, but I just go. I can’t stay here another second. There are no stores in the area, but after walking a few blocks, I come across a bus stop and I sit in the cover to get out of the rain. Not that it matters; I'm already soaked to the bone. I pull my phone from my pocket. It’s wet, but thankfully, it still works. The worst part is getting my shaking fingers to work properly and put in the info for a car.

I think I fall asleep while I wait, or maybe I just disassociate the entire time, who knows. When the car pulls up, I’m grateful for the heat and the towels. A lot of cars in the area have towels because people get caught in the rain all the time, and this one is no different.

“I promise I’ll give you a big tip,” I mutter, closing my eyes as I hug the towel close to me for warmth. I still feel so cold though.

“Youlook rough, my friend. Getting caught in the rain ain’t so bad. At least you’re still breathing,” the older male driver comments.

Am I though? Because I don’t feel like it.

I’m still numb by the time I get home. My phone won’t stop ringing, so I shut it off before getting into the shower. I turn the water as hot as it’ll go. It’s scorching my skin, but I don’t feel a damn thing. Or maybe I just don't care.

Theo lied to me.

The thought has me violent, but I don’t have the energy to act on it. All I can imagine is putting my fist through this tile, but I can hardly stand up, never mind punch something.

The water runs cold before the warmth is able to seep into my bones. I get out, put on sweatpants and a sweatshirt, and crawl into bed.

The rain sounds like someone pounding on my door, so I wake up too many times during the night thinking Theo is here, threatening to knock down the door if I don’t open it. When I realize there’s no one there, I can’t decide if I’m relieved or disappointed. Maybe both.

He lied to me, and he lied to his fiancée. He was cheating on her the entire time…

I still can’t wrap my head around him not caring about my feelings on the matter. Especially because I offered to be hisfriend. We could have stayed that way until he was ready… I would have helped him. If he was scared, I would have let him lean on me, but he never even asked. He chose to take this road. After everything, he chose to hurt me. I wasn’t enough for him to be truthful with. I guess I’m just not a person who deserves respect—from anyone.

I force myself to go back to sleep over and over until it’s getting dark again. I have no idea why I’m allowing myself to sit here and be depressed.

A glance at the clock tells me I have twenty minutes before my car will be here to bring me to a date. For the first time since I started working at Foxy’s, I consider not going, but I won’t do that to her, and it’s entirely unfair to the client. I also don’t want to risk my job over someone who doesn’t give a shit about me.

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