Page 12 of Tobias

“No, thank you,” I say, reaching for one of the figs. She nods and leaves, and I pop it into my mouth. Wow, this is good. Better than I thought it would be. Not typically a goat cheese fan, but everything works nicely together.

“I’m going to say fate led us here together,” he says, picking up his drink.

“Is that so?”

“Yeah.” He shrugs. “Whatever reason you’re here for, it’s supposed to be me here with you.”

I sigh, picking up another fig and chewing thoughtfully, then washing it down with a mouthful of scotch. When I look up, I find him watching me carefully.

“I think I’m gay,” I blurt.

If he’s shocked by it, he doesn’t show it, and for that I am grateful beyond words.

“Not the first time I’ve heard that,” he answers simply.

“I’m supposed to be married in a few months,” I add, knowing I can top anything he’s ever had before.

“I’m going to take a leap here and say it’s to a woman?”

I nod. “It’s to a woman.”

“And you’re trying to figure out if you should call it off or not?” he asks carefully.

“That’s the thing,” I say, reaching for another fig. The alcohol is starting to work now, not only warming my belly but settling my nerves. “I don’t have a clue. I just… need to know.”

I have no idea what I’m going to do with this information, but trying to ignore it hasn’t helped. Calling off the wedding isn’t an option. My family would disown me, and I’d ruin Marianne’s life. It’s just… for my own peace of mind, I need to know.

“And you thought going on a date with a guy would tell you this about yourself?”

Maybe it’s the alcohol, but I feel like I could tell Tobias anything and he wouldn’t judge me. Maybe it’s just because he’s so calm and his eyes are trusting. I feel like I could expose my soul to him and not feel weird about it. He’s the kind of person you spill your heart to without even realizing it. And I think that’s why I end up word-vomiting everything to him.

“I have these dreams. Sex dreams that turn into wet dreams.” His eyes flicker with excitement, but for once, my dick acts right and I keep going instead of stopping towonderwhyhe’s excited about that. “They’ve been going on for months. It’s always with a guy.”

“Since we’re being so open here, let me ask you this: have you had sex with your fiancée?” I nod. “And you’ve come?” Fuck, that word out of his mouth, the way his lips press together when pronouncing theM… I nod again. “But…”

“How do you know there’s a but?”

“Because you’re here.”

Right. That makes sense.

“But,” I say with a sigh. “Something is missing. It’s not enough. Not… satisfying.”

“And I’m also going to guess you’ve never had sex with a guy before?”

I shake my head.

“Is that what you were expecting to happen tonight?”

“What? No.” I shake my head, panic seizing my chest. “No, not at all. I wouldn’t think that about you or anyone else. You’re a professional.”

He’s chuckling, and I frown.

“Calm down, Theo. Is it okay if I call you Theo?” I nod, reaching for my glass again. “Cool. You can call me Toby if you want.”

“I like Tobias.”

“Yeah, me too.” He grabs his drink, taking a sip. “Anyway, I think the only way you’ll actually know is if you do it. And I’m not condoning you cheating on your fiancée. Not a fan of cheating at all, and I don’t condone it in any way, butthis isn’t about me. You have to think about it, right? What’s going to bother you more? Cheating on your fiancée orneverknowing if you’re gay? Or bi or anything else.”

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