Page 36 of Tobias

I shake my head.

Absolute shit. How’s yours?

I stare at the phone, hoping he answers. He’s a friend. I need a friend right now. My family is… difficult. I could text Asher and Morgan in our group chat, but I don’t want to ruin their day with my bullshit. They enjoy time with their families. They look forward to the holidays. The only issue they have is Morgan’s sister, but she’s the problem and everyone knows it. Overall, they’re happy with their lives and how they live them.

Maybe that’s what’s missing in my relationship with Asher and Morgan. The reason why I can talk to Tobias about this stuff and not them. There’s something inside Tobias that’s inside me too. Some type of sadness that makes me feel comfortable sharing thoughts with him. I don’t feel like a burden when I open up to him, and I don’t feel embarrassed. It’s like he understands.

Maybe that’s presumptuous. I don’t know the guy, not really. He could have more baggage than a plane, but there’s something about him that makes me feel different. He’s the kind of person I can unload on, and he can brush it off. He won’t let it bother him because he’s strong. Much stronger than I am or could ever be.

Asher is different. He’s just… different. I can’t explain it any other way.

Absolute shit.

His text makes me smile. I shouldn’t be happy that he’s miserable too, but knowing I’m not alone in this is comforting.

If I get drunk and text you stupid things, I’m sorry.

I’d welcome it at this point.

Is that a challenge?

If you’re up for it.

I can text stupid things without the alcohol. I’m talented like that.

I grin, biting on my bottom lip as I stare at the phone, waiting for his response. A whole minute passes and nothing comes through. My fingers hover over the keyboard, ready to type something out, but I don’t want to be pushy or overbearing.

We’re just friends.

I suddenly feel like I don’t know how to have a friend. Which is weird because I have friends and always have had them. Why are things different with Tobias? Because I want to fuck him? No, because I want him to fuckme.

Ever since I met Tobias, the man in my dreams who fucks me has a face. A handsome face with a strong jaw and dark hair…

Yeah, that’s definitely the difference between being friends with Asher and Morgan versus Tobias.

Someone bangs on the door, causing it to rattle behind me, and I jerk away from it.

“Be right out!”

“Hurry up, moron!” Michael calls, banging again.

“If you need to shit that bad, go upstairs,” I call back, going to the sink to wash my hands and face.

I didn’t need to pee; I just needed to get away.

Michael keeps banging on the door like the annoying brother he is. Being the oldest is a fucking curse, I swear.

“Keep banging and I won’t leave,” I call out.

“I’ll tell Mom!” he responds.

I yank the door open to face my brother who looks so much like me.

“Are you ever going to grow up?” I growl. “You’re twenty-eight, for fuck’s sake.”

His bright eyes shine with humor. “Only when you do.”

I shove past him and make my way to the dining room, where the grand table is full. My parents, both my brothers—well, except Michael who is in the bathroom right now—and their girlfriends. Marianne and her parents, plus her sister and her sister’s husband. Betty is six months pregnant, and Marianne is sitting beside her, rubbing her belly, eyes full of love.

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