Page 37 of Tobias

It makes my stomach sick to think that could be her. Round with my child. Happy.

I don’t hate the idea of having a child, I just hate the idea of being tied to Marianne forever. It doesn’t feel right. Nothing about her feels right after having Tobias grind all over me—after having dreams of him fucking me.

“Sweetie, come feel this!” Marianne calls when she spots me.

I look from her to Betty, who is leaning back comfortably.

“Oh, no. It’s okay,” I say, waving my hand as I make my way to my seat beside Marianne.

“It’s okay,” Betty says, moving her chair a little. “I don’t mind.”

Well, I do.

Why does no one care what I want?

“Go ahead,” Lawrence says. “I don’t mind, and it’s pretty cool.”

With a heavy breath, I reach my hand out and Marianne puts hers on top of mine, then presses it to her sister’s stomach.

“Just wait. Hold on…” Marianne says through a smile.

She gasps as I yank my hand away when something in Betty’s stomach pushes against me.

“Wow,” I say with a nervous chuckle. “That’s weird.”

“Weird?” Betty laughs, running her hands over her stomach. “You better get used to it. Marianne will be there soon enough.”

Marianne turns to me with a smile, reaching over to take my hand.

It feels all wrong. Too small. Too soft. Too… not Tobias.

Chapter Fourteen

Tobias

I walk into the living room of my mother’s house. The scent of cranberries and spice fills the warm, stale air. There’s always been a stench to this house that makes me nauseous. Maybe it’s just memories of living here.

Jason, my sister's husband, is sitting on the couch, staring at the TV that’s placed on the entertainment center that's seen better days. There’s cheering, announcements, and guys in uniforms. Football. Jason is your typical sport's guy. Die hard fan of all the local teams.

“Hey, Tobias,” he says, lifting his hand in a wave and giving me a half smile.

“Hey, Jason. Where are they?”

“In the kitchen.”

I shrug my coat off, hanging it on the stand by the door then toe my shoes off before making my way around the couch and to the kitchen.

“I’m here,” I announce as I walk in, trying my best to sound happy. But let’s be serious, I don’t have a lot of energy to fake liking my family. It's too difficult.

Molly looks up, giving me an annoyed look—and this is why they aren’t worth my time.

“Didn’t think you’d show,” she comments.

“I said I would,” I answer with a sigh.

“Your word means nothing, Tobias.”

I grit my teeth, seeking out my mother who is hiding behind the fridge door.

---