Page 80 of Tobias

I understand that all too well.

Christmas Eve is in a few days. I never do anything on that day besides work. Christmas day is what I get off from the rehab and don’t always take it off from Foxy’s, but I did this year, and I’m glad I did. Spending the night with Theo is better than going on a random date.

Speaking of, since I have some downtime now, I look through my schedule for the week to figure out what’s going on. Family dinner date, business date, and… charity event? I must’ve missed that when I accepted it. Not that I would have turned it down, but I would have prepared better by getting an outfit sooner. Of course, I have plenty of tailored suits for such an occasion, but if this isn’t a reason to go shopping, which I love, I don’t know what is.

I pull up the ride share app and order a car to my favorite tailor. His shop is open for another two hours, and if I offer him enough money, he’ll make sure my suit is done in enoughtime. Forty-five minutes later, I’m walking through the door, and the little Italian man hobbles over.

“Tobias, my boy!” He holds his arms out, wanting a hug. “How have you been?”

“Pretty good. How about you?”

“Meh. You know. Business.” I chuckle. “What can I do for you?” I give him a look and he rolls his eyes, huffing out, “Follow me.”

“You’re the best, Antonio!” I call out dramatically.

He measures me, then looks through some suits. When I come here, I don’t do a damn thing but stand here and look pretty. I tell him everything he wants to know, like what the event is for, the time, the place, all sorts of stuff. He does his magic and somehow finds me something that is perfect. It’s a talent that not many have.

“This is the one,” he announces, walking over with agreensuit.

“Oh no, Antonio. I can’t wear that.”

He looks at it, then back at me like I’m crazy. “Why not? It’s Christmas.”

“I’ll look like the Onceler and the Riddler had a baby,” I complain, and he frowns, likely not knowing who either of those characters are. “It won’t work.”

“With your eyes, your skin tone, and your dark hair? My boy, this suit was made for you. Now go.” He shoos me. “Put it on and see for yourself.”

Begrudgingly, I do as he says with my back to the mirror the entire time. I’m going to turn around and see nothing but an oversized green bean. Only when I turn, that isn’t what I see at all. I stumble back, the breath leaving my lungs.

“Damnit,” I mutter. “I actually look good.”

He was right. The dark tone of the green paired with everything he mentioned about me looks good. I don’t look like a comic book character, which is a damn relief.

When I walk out of the dressing room, Antonio is grinning smugly. “See. I told you. You never listen to me, boy. You should. I know these things. It’s my job.”

I step onto the platform and let him do his thing. Honestly, I look so good in this, I may wear it on Christmas just to show it off to Theo.

Chapter Thirty-One

Theodore

“Tonight, we celebrate!” my father announces, holding up his champagne glass.

The whole family—mine and Marianne’s—is around the dinner table, waiting for dinner to be served. My father passed out champagne glasses and filled everyone’s glass to top. There is a smile on his face that’s brighter than I’ve ever seen before.

“To our families joining,” he begins, turning his attention to me. “To my son for making this possible.” His gaze turns to Marianne at my side, causing my stomach to drop. “And to beautiful Marianne for putting up with my son.” He chuckles, lifting his glass higher. “Let’s drink!”

I tip my glass back, taking a mouthful of the sharp, bubbly liquid, trying to dissect what I’m feeling.

The more time I spend with Tobias, the more I realize that is the life I want. He is the kind of person I need. Each day, I come to terms with the fact that I do not want to bewith a woman, and definitely not Marianne. And each day, I hammer the nail into my coffin a little more, keeping up this lie.

But how can I let down my father now? I’ve never seen him so happy, and he’s certainly never been so proud of me before. And Marianne… she’s beaming on the side of me, proud to be part of this too. Can I be so selfish to ruin this all just for my own happiness?

I can be happy with Marianne… I can. Maybe not as happy as I could be with Tobias, but it wouldn’t be terrible. I’d get by. I’d manage. Sex isn’t everything, right? Marianne and I get along, and we’ve had sex enough times. It’s always been fine. I shouldn’t ruin my life just because sex is better with a guy. That’s crazy.

Only I know deep down this is more than just sex. It’s Tobias. It’s his personality, his smile, his confidence… it’s just him. I want him in ways I shouldn’t. In ways I said I wouldn’t, when he made it clear this was only a friends with benefits thing.

“Theodore?” my father says as if it isn’t the first time he’s said it.

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