Page 59 of The Island of Hopes and Dreams

Lola wanted Rhys in all senses of the word, but in his arms, snuggled together in the dark, was perfect. She didn’t want to complicate things with sex, especially after today’s events, and she sensed Rhys felt the same. Their desire had been blatantly obvious when they’d been kissing, their hands roving just enough to sense, well, everything.

Lola smiled and slid her arm tighter over Rhys’s where it lay against her stomach. He planted a kiss on the back of her head and stayed there, his breath hot, his arms encircling. The feeling of safety, of comfort, of peace, of being home was everything. She’d never felt anything like it, even if she knew this moment would be fleeting. This feeling would disperse as they scattered to the wind when their time on Sardinia came to an end.

35

Waking up next to Lola should have made Rhys the happiest man in the world, but despite their connection and spending the night together – even if they’d only shared each other’s company – uncertainty still tugged at him. Regardless of the yearning he’d felt last night – and the desire that was so obvious this morning it was downright torturous – Lola was hurting and had come to him in fear; his desire was not something he felt comfortable acting on, however much he wanted to.

Instead of initiating sex, he snuck out of bed, pulled on a clean T-shirt and shorts and made a Nespresso coffee. Opening the sliding doors to the courtyard, he clasped his cup and breathed in the scent of herbs, damp soil and the coffee steaming into the fresh morning air.

Rhys gazed up at the vibrant green of the juniper trees against the wash of blue sky, the leaves translucent where the sun hit. He sat down on the edge of the pool and dunked his feet into the water, which was warm enough to combat the chill of the morning. He sipped his coffee while watching the birds flit between the trees and listened to the rustle of leaves as the branches were stirred by the breeze.

Rhys wasn’t sure how long he sat there watching the ants soldiering across the paving and the butterflies dancing over the thyme, when he heard the coffee machine whirring. He turned just as Lola stepped outside and his heart juddered at the sight of her in the shirt he’d been wearing last night. With her bare legs, ruffled hair and smudged make-up, she’d never looked more beautiful.

She sat down next to him with her coffee and plunged her feet into the pool with a sigh. ‘That is gloriously warm. You been out here long?’

Rhys drained the remainder of his coffee. ‘A little while.’

‘It’s peaceful.’

‘More so than last night,’ he said quietly. ‘Everyone’s still asleep.’

‘You didn’t want to lie in?’

Not when all I could think about was wanting you, Rhys didn’t say. ‘Bit of an early bird.’ He shrugged.

‘You keep school hours, that’s why.’

‘You must have to get up early for your job?’

‘Of course, but not all the time. My hours are quite erratic with lots of late nights thrown in and travel. Keeps me on my toes. And I’ve always been a bit of a night owl, although now I’m in my thirties I definitely can’t do the late nights and early starts like I used to. At least not without feeling like shit. The grumpiness is unreal – you would not want to witness it.’

Oh but I would, Rhys thought.

‘So, Mr Early Riser, is your sabbatical your way of taking a chance on doing something different with your life or do you really intend to go back to teaching?’

That was a big question for first thing in the morning; he gazed up at the pearly blue sky while he considered it.

‘It’s not a stipulation of taking the time off, but my intention is to return, although the year away is an opportunity for me to focus on doing something different and what I might want to do differently, you know, in the future.’

‘You’re being very non-committal.’ Lola slipped her arm in his and kicked her feet beneath the surface of the pool, sending warm water lapping further up his legs. ‘Saying out loud that you want to change your life scares you silly, doesn’t it?’

‘It’s that obvious?’ Her arm was tight, grounding him. His elbow brushing the side of her breast sent heat coursing through him. Being open and honest was less scary than bottling everything up only to wind up unhappy and filled with fear and anxiety. He didn’t want to remain in an endless downward spiral. ‘You’re absolutely right. I don’t know what I’m afraid of – failing, maybe? Worried I’ll feel worse about myself than I already do?’ He glanced at her. ‘Than I did. I feel pretty good right now.’

Lola put her cup down and turned to face him, her eyes bright despite the smudges of mascara beneath them.

‘To manifest change, you have to vocalise it and believe in it to make it happen.’

‘But that’s what I still need to figure out. I love teaching. The kids are the best; the workload, the stress, the challenges not so much, but I don’t hate it by any means, I’ve just got into a rut and filled with negativity in here.’ He pressed his fist to the centre of his chest. ‘Travelling around Europe selfishly doing something for myself for a few weeks I hope will be the start of me healing.’

‘It’s not selfish if it’s to protect your mental health.’ Lola placed her hand on his thigh. ‘I’d say that’s essential.’

A phone pinged from inside the room.

‘That must be yours,’ Rhys said, lifting up his own phone.

Lola covered her mouth as she yawned. ‘Who’s messaging me this early in the morning?’ She went still, then scrambled to her feet.

Rhys watched as she disappeared inside and scooped up her phone. Her shoulders tensed. He knew who it was without having to ask.

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