She nods, too quickly. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.”
My jaw tightens, but I don’t push. Not now. I nod once and turn away, just as my phone starts to ring. I glance down at the screen, thumb hovering over the answer button.
Whatever it is, it’ll have to be quick, because tonight, I plan to give her everything. The diamond bracelet I got for her on this trip, and then the truth.
Tonight, she is going to learn that I’m in love with my wife, and I’m done pretending otherwise.
25
Chapter 21
Xiomara
I wanted to tell Zasha how I feel the moment he walked back into this house, but things heated up too quickly, and now lying here alone, I find myself restless.
He said he wants to take me out for dinner, and the part of me that is apprehensive wants to delay telling him for as long as possible. However, the eager part wants to get it over with.
I step into the shower, allowing the warm water to wash over me, yet it does little to soothe the nerves tingling beneath my skin. I keep replaying our moments together, like scenes from a film I never want to end.
His arm around my waist in bed.
The sound of his laughter the first time I called him a brooding bear.
The time he got injured and allowed me tend to him.
When he gave me wildflowers and told me they were supposed to come first.
Every moment I’ve had with him is seared into my memory.
I dry off slowly, more careful with my hair than usual. I pick a simple dress, something soft and midnight blue. It clings where it should, but doesn’t scream for attention.
I want him to see me tonight. Not for how I look, but for who I am. Not as a Mafia princess, but the woman inside me that have loved him for so long.
My reflection in the mirror doesn’t look nervous. But inside? I’m buzzing more than a busy bee. I feel Lit up with something dangerously close to hope.
I wrap a shawl over my arms and step quietly into the hallway towards his office. The door is slightly ajar, and I hear him speaking.
"No," he says. Then his voice becomes clearer and sharper: "I can’t wait to end this sham of a marriage."
Everything inside me freezes.
“Look, I know you said I should be sure about this before speaking to her.” He sighs “And I am absolutely sure. She deserves to know that I am no longer interested in this arrangement.”
That’s all I need to hear. I don’t wait for the rest. My pulse drops, and my hands go cold as I walk away with my heart splintering with every step. I walk away quietly, one step after the other, even though I can barely see where I’m going.
The hallway blurs around me, and my vision sways and shakes, my tears refusing to stay where they belong.
His voice echoes in my head like a curse I can’t shake off: “I’m tired of this sham of a marriage and can’t wait to end it…”
I wonder who was on the phone and what they had said before. I just know what I hear, and I know I’ll never unhear it.
All of a sudden, I feel cold inside, and I find myself struggling for breath. My limbs feel like they’re wading through water.
I step into our bedroom—the one we’ve shared these last few months, the one where he kissed me breathless just hours ago.
My legs nearly give out, and I reach for the edge of the bed, gripping it like an anchor. My heart is pounding so violently I feel it everywhere—in my ribs, my throat, my ears.
Is this what heartbreak feels like?