Page 39 of The Jack*ss in Class

TEMPEST

My pendejo of a phone wouldn’t shut up.

I cracked one eye open, immediately regretting every life choice that had led to this moment. Especially the fancy fruity flavored vodka. And the beer pong. And... oh god.

Flynn’s lap.

I’d sat in Flynn Kingman’s lap. In front of everyone. A lot of the night was a blur, but I remembered that.

My phone buzzed again. Twenty-seven notifications, all from the Baby Donkey Sitters Club group chat. With growing horror, I opened the first message.

It was a video. Of me. Downing two shots. At the same time.

Kill me now.

The next message was worse. A photo of me curled up in Flynn’s lap like some kind of drunk sorority cat, his arms wrapped around me, looking down at me with an expression that made my chest hurt.

“You’re alive.” Parker’s whisper stabbed directly into my brain. “How’s the hangover?”

I pulled my pillow over my face. “I’m dead. This is my ghost. January whatever the day is will now be known as the true Dio de las Muertos. Please delete all social media immediately and find me in the afterlife.”

“But then how would we preserve the greatest moment in KAT history? When Tempest Navarro, queen of control, decided to teach the entire rugby team Spanish insults about Flynn Kingman?”

I peeked out from under the pillow. “I did what now?”

“Oh, it gets better.” The bed dipped as Parker sat down. “You called him arrogant in front of everyone. Then something about his... assets? Ricky refused to translate that part, for which I later made out with him to reward his act of service. And then you fell asleep in Flynn’s lap.”

“You did what? And I did nawwwwt.”

Parker held up her phone, showing me the incriminating photo. “You absolutely did. And then Flynn wouldn’t let anyone else take you home. Hannah, Alice, and I had to help him sneak up the back stairs to our room since you were completely out. He carried you the whole way, got you tucked in with water and Advil by your bed.”

Oh no. No, no, no.

A soft bray from the corner of the room interrupted my spiral of mortification. I lifted my head, slowly, because the room was still spinning, to see my secret roommate watching me with concerned brown eyes.

“Hey, baby,” I whispered. “Come here. I’m okay. I’m...okay.”

The donkey clip-clopped over to my bed and pressed his velvet nose against my cheek. For a baby animal who’d been basically abandoned at birth, he had remarkable emotional intelligence.

“He was worried about you,” Parker said. “Kept making these little sounds whenever you stirred in your sleep.”

“Flynn?” It was against every rule in the book to even have a man upstairs at the house, but to have one spend the night? That was a conduct unbecoming a sister offense that could get one booted.

I shot upright, then immediately regretted it as my head threatened to explode. “What? Flynn spent the night? He knows?”

“Relax. He did not spend the night.”

“But he knows about the donkey being in our room?” I was going to throw up.

“He was a little distracted making sure you were okay. Maybe he didn’t notice.” She handed me a bottle of water. “Seriously, Temporino. What happened last night? That wasn’t like you.”

I flopped back into my pillows, wishing they would suck me up.

“I remember him leaving with some girl, and then...” I pressed the cold bottle to my forehead. “It’s all kind of fuzzy after that.”

“You mean Sasha? The one he drove home because she was too drunk to drive?” Parker’s voice was gentle. “He came right back. Looking for you.”

The donkey nudged my arm, clearly picking up on mydistress. I scratched behind his ears, grateful for the distraction.

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