Page 33 of Book People

‘Because I don’t even like you.’

I ignore this, because I’m starting to see what the problem is and maybe I should have known it all along, but I didn’t. The tension between us. Those sparks in his eyes sometimes when he looks at me.

I raise a brow. ‘Is this why my existence is a problem? You’re attracted to me and you don’t like it?’

The muscle in his jaw leaps. ‘Yes,’ he forces out through gritted teeth.

Something turns over inside me. Satisfaction.

Yes, girl, you still got it.

I can’t deny I like that. It feels healing, especially after Jasper with his petty slights and snide comments. His small criticisms that steadily eroded me away until I was listing on my foundations. I was too loud. Too quiet. I could be selfish. I needed to be less uptight. I gave out mixed signals. I needed to respect his time, and on and on.

I’d thought thatIwas the problem. That I was boring and not pretty enough, not experienced enough, too inhibited, or any one of the thousand things that women beat themselves up for not being. Even after the truth of him and our relationship was revealed, there was a part of me that still blamed myself.

Now, after kissing Sebastian, that part has gone silent. Because now, even though Sebastian obviously thinks I’m a problem too, it’s not because I’m lacking in anything. It’s because I’ve gottoo muchof what he wants, and even though he’s angry, he’s not trying to make me feel less. He’s not criticising me or slighting me, or manipulating me into thinking I’ve done something wrong.

He’s angry for wanting me and is honest about it.

In fact, honest is all he’s been since I met him.

God, that’s refreshing.

Then something else occurs to me.

If one kiss from Sebastian can rock my world, then sex with him will destroy me. Literally.

Shit. Maybe he’s right after all. Maybe thiswasa mistake.

‘So,’ I say eventually. ‘What do you want to do about it?’

‘Nothing.’ There is finality in the word. He means it. ‘I never date women in the village and I’m not changing the habit of years just for you.’

My stomach drops at that, but I ignore it. Sure, I like honesty, but sometimes it sucks.

‘Okay.’ I try to sound casual, like I don’t care a bit, and I think I’m successful. Mostly. ‘I hear you.’

He glares as if I’m arguing with him. ‘If I want sex, I find it elsewhere. I don’t sleep with women who live here, it’s too close to home. And as you say, we’re working together. This festival is too important to get derailed by an inconvenient sexual attraction.’

I lift my hands. ‘Hey, I’m not arguing with you.’

He continues to glower. ‘You’re a problem, Miss Jones.’

‘Miss Jones? Seriously? After you kissed me senseless? Surely I deserve a Kate?’

‘Like I said, you’re a problem,Miss Jones.’

My God. The man is so rigidly intense and dramatic, he’s impossible. It’s starting to annoy me. He may be more straight up than Jasper, but I’m really over being a problem.

‘Actually,’ I snap, ‘I’mnot the problem. You’re the problem,Mr Blackwood. I can’t do anything about the fact that I exist, but if you’re going to continue being a grumpy bastard just because of your own silly little rules, then may I suggest investing in a chastity belt? Now.’ I lean forward and start gathering up the pieces of paper that are scattered on the floor. ‘I’m going to look at these letters because we need to see if they’re something Lisa Underwood is going to be interested in.’

‘Take them.’ He bites out each word. ‘Take them home and have a look at them there.’

I glance up at him in surprise. ‘You don’t want to—’

‘No.’ He’s still standing there, rigid, white around the mouth. Then he adds, ‘Please, Miss Jones.’

He looks almost . . . tortured, and my annoyance fades. I had no idea I have such an effect on him. I’d be even more flattered if it hadn’t appeared to actively hurt him, and I don’t want to hurt him.

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