Page 19 of Hard Discipline

I checked on her out of the corner of my eye as I walked over to the coffee table with the box, and it was enough to see the flood of relief in her face as she watched me. I already knew what she was thinking, her busy mind going over and over where I’d gone and for how long, and perhaps I’d abandoned her. That’s good, though. I want her to keep thinking about me, because eventually she’ll learn that she doesn’t have to think. That all she has to do is give me her complete and utter trust and in return I’ll give her pleasure beyond her wildest dreams.

I still need to get into her head more though, find out her weak points and vulnerabilities. She’s sensitive about failure, I could see it in her eyes when she picked out the vibrator and I told her that wasn’t the right answer. Makes sense considering what Lucas told me about her acing most of her classes at Yale before she dropped out. She’s an anxious high achiever who wants to please, but is also as stubborn as fuck.

I could see just how stubborn when I came back into the room and she was kneeling there, radiating determination.She’d had a battle with herself, no doubt, about whether to leave or to stay, and in the end her stubbornness won out.

You were hoping she’d go.

I push the thought away as I rise to my feet again and go back to the coffee table for the other clamp. Why would I hope that she’d leave? Yes, she’s young and my son’s ex, and a submissive new to the scene. I’ve warned her what I’m like and she accepted that, and I have to admit I’m enjoying this more than I thought I would. But that’s all.

She’s different though, you can’t deny it.

I certainly fucking do deny it. I’ve never wanted to train a sub before and sure, there’s something… possessive in me that likes the idea of training her to suit my needs alone, but that’s a timing thing. Gabrielle’s birthday and all that shit. And yes, she did push, and that alone would be enough for me to refuse, but I didn’t, so that part’s on me. It’s not for any other reason.

I pick up the third clamp and go back to where she’s kneeling. The fine chain linking the jeweled clamps on her nipples hangs between her breasts, glittering like the jewels as they rise and fall with her heightened breathing.

A flush has risen into her cheeks, making the silver of her eyes look even darker as they cling to mine. The pulse at the base of her throat is racing and down between her thighs, that little pussy of hers is slick and glistening.

She’s a fucking delicious sight, I have to say.

I crouch once again in front of her, but I say nothing as I attach the third clamp to the O-ring that links the two currently on her nipples. Then I look down between her thighs at all that wet, pink flesh. “This one is going to hurt,” I tell her as I look back into her eyes. “But I think you can deal, can’t you, sub? You can answer.”

“Y-y-yes,” she manages. “M-Master.”

“Very prettily said,” I murmur, noting how her flush deepens at the compliment, and getting a kick of satisfaction out of her response myself. I am sparing with my compliments and praise, because it makes it much more intense for the sub when they finally earn one from me. Obviously being praised is something she likes, so I file that away for future reference.

I look down between her thighs. “Spread your pussy for me. Let me see that hard little clit.”

She hesitates only a second before dropping her shaking hands between her thighs, holding apart the soft, pink folds. I can smell her, the sweetness of roses and the musky scent of feminine arousal, and it’s fucking hot. Much hotter than it should be, quite frankly, but my dick disagrees. It likes the smell of her, wants all that tight, slick flesh around it, and it’s insistent. In fact, I can’t think of when my cock was last so fucking demanding.

I ignore it, though, because no matter how insistent it is, it’s not getting what it wants, not yet. Instead, I gently close the third clamp around the base of her clit. She gives a soft little cry, her body jerking and shivering as I adjust the pressure, keeping tabs on her expression all the while.

I want her on the border of pleasure and pain, and to test that border. I want to see what kind of strength she has and how I can use that to drive her out of her mind and give that busy brain of hers a rest, because I can see it spinning and spinning in her eyes.

This is what she needs, even if she doesn’t know that herself yet. She’s looking for someone to stop her thinking, to let her exist in the moment where the past and the future don’t exist. Where there is no success or failure, only pleasure.

“Does it hurt, sub?” I ask.

“Y-yes.” Her eyes have filled with helpless tears and I know she’s fighting to keep them at bay, I can see the battle going on inside her.

“Too much?”

She swallows. “I c-can handle it.”

I stare into her liquid gray eyes to see if she’s giving me the truth, and she is. She doesn’t want to disappoint me or fail me, I can see that also, but she’ll learn that it’s not her success or failure that matters right here and now. It’s mine. Because I’m the one in charge.

“You can cry,” I tell her, giving her permission to weep and scream and let out whatever emotion is inside her. “You know I like your tears.”

She swallows yet again and shakes, the tears beginning to fall, and I can tell she doesn’t like it. That even though I gave her permission to cry, she hasn’t given herself permission, yet they fall anyway.

“Eyes on me,” I order as she tries to look away. “Always on me.”

She’s trembling harder as she meets my gaze and I hold hers pinned to mine. Then I reach out and take the chains that link the clamps and I tug on them, adding to the sensations she’s feeling. A cry escapes her and her back arches, and I look into her darkening eyes, seeing the pleasure/pain burning bright there. She likes this, even though it hurts as much as it pleases. I tug a little harder, because she’s a fighter, this one, and fucking delicious draped in my jewels and chains with the most sensitive parts of her body under my direct control.

“You can say your safe word,” I remind her. “You can say it any time.”

She’s thinking about it, I know she is, but the moment I say the words, I can see the determination inside her harden, thestrength I’ve already seen in her, rising to the surface. Her jaw tightens, her lips compressing, flames glittering in her eyes.

Fuck, this woman is not just an anxious overthinker or a victim. There’s more to her than that, and for the first time, it’s not only the Master who wants to know more about her but the man, too. I want to know happened to her during the attack that made her drop out of college. That turned her into a pale, colorless version of the woman kneeling in front of me now, all pink and silver, white and red, with eyes like fucking molten mercury.

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