Page 63 of Say You'll Stay

She pushes further up to the second knuckle in a near panic, desperate to feel something,anything,and the sharp sting at her overeager effort is both welcome because it means she’s not broken, and a whole other worry all its own. One of her own slim fingershurts. She can’t imagine the pain of taking the entire length of him inside her.

She gives up, pulling her hand away and feeling her arousal fade fast. There’s no hope of reclaiming it even after a token attempt at focusing on the spot that could get her there.

She hasn’t had an orgasm in months and she won’t be getting one tonight, either.

The water runs cold and she curses in frustration as she turns it off.

It’s fine.

Women have babies all the time and they have sex after or there wouldn’t be any siblings.

It’s just too soon, that’s all. She needs another couple weeks to heal, and then it won’t be an issue.

Don’t rush this. It’s fine. He may not want you anyway, so what does it matter?

When she finds him waiting in the bedroom, his face lights up at the sight of her before she says a single word.

“You look good,” he says shyly, somehow managing to make her feel beautiful with three words when she’d been in the middle of berating herself.

He takes his turn in the shower and she does not think about him naked in there alone.

Nope. Absolutely not.

Her daydreams aren’t doing her any favors today, so she thinks about Lucy instead. Lays her on the bed and unwraps the towel so her little arms and legs spring free. Olivia can’t keep the smile off her face at the sight of her daughter, so perfect and happy and so very alive. After all the hardships they’ve endured, she’s still thriving and if someone told her how all this would play out weeks ago, she’d have been in disbelief. Was so sure back then that her ex would be their downfall one way or another if the virus didn’t get them first. While one of those is still a threat, the other is only a memory she can’t shake.

She bends down and kisses Lucy’s chubby hands, giving them a gentle squeeze.

‘I love you.’

‘You’re so smart.’

‘I’m so happy you’re here with us.’

A comment between every peck earns her a giggle to follow, and that’s how Cole finds them later, on the bed having a quiet moment. He pauses in the doorway, water dripping from damp hair, looking like he’s walked in on something he’s not a part of.

“Come here,” she offers a hand in invitation and slips her palm into his when he comes close. She tugs him down beside her and he goes easy, his relief at being included obvious even if he’s trying to hide it.

She’s never given him a reason to doubt that they’re a unit now, the three of them together under whatever label they land beneath, but he’s likely given himself plenty of doubts.

“You look good, too.” She smiles, threading her fingers through his towel-fluffed hair. It feels like a bold gesture to touch him this way, yet he allows it.

A knock at the door startles them both, putting them on edge, but it’s only a food delivery offered on fancy china dishes and that fear quickly transforms into suspicion.

“Think it’s poisoned?” he says dryly once they’re alone.

“I’m hungry enough that I’m willing to risk it.” She takes a bite of fresh scrambled eggs, wondering where the chickens are. “This is a lot of trouble to go through for two people off the street begging for sanctuary.”

“That’s what I’m thinking.”

“We leave tomorrow?”

He nods, tearing off a piece of bread with his teeth. “Hell yes.”

Chapter 17

She hadn’t been joking about wanting to feel the sheets on her bare legs.

Cole’s in bed with a half-naked woman and it feels like he won the lottery.

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