Page 83 of Say You'll Stay

She guides his hand between them, and he catches on, skillfully tracing a few swift circles just above their connection, before losing control himself. That’s all it takes before she’s gripping him tight, hips rolling and legs bending high by his ribs while spasms sear through her, muscles squeezing him hard with the force of it.

She’s over-sensitive and sated when he follows a few moments later. His body jerks and his cock twitches as his face presses into the curve of her neck, her name on his lips like a declaration. She has enough energy left to wrap her ankles around his waist and lock him in place, one hand threading through his hair and the other curled up his shoulder as she breathes him in.

As they lie together, their aftershocks mingle, his weight delicious, while the lingering heaviness between her thighs triggers endorphins to surge through her veins. She is drunk on this feeling. Already wants to do this again and again, and can’t believe she’s even having that thought. It’s a foreign concept, but she’s so ready for this to be her life now and so lucky that it is.

When he finally pulls out of her, she winces, missing him already. They tangle together beneath the sheets, her ear over his pounding heart and his hand stroking warm and easy up her back.

“I wish it didn’t take the apocalypse for us to meet, but finding you is still the best thing to ever happen to me,” hesays into the darkness.

“I’d do it all again if I knew we’d end up here.”

* * *

Later, after she’s fed the baby and they’ve curled up together again, quick to fall into a deep sleep, Cole flinches beside her. His eyes move rapidly under closed lids and a pained moan escapes into the space between them. She is about to move away, like she knows that she should, but his arm finds her and instead of lashing out, he curls into her body seeking comfort.

She pulls him closer, feeling him partially wake with a start before reflexively settling his head over her ribs and allowing her to hold him. Even one blissful night together isn’t enough to chase away every ounce of stress that fuels their nightmares.

“I’ve got you,” she whispers, letting him drift off cocooned in her arms where no one else can touch him.

His heart must know the safety she offers even in sleep and the trust in his reaction, when waking him during a nightmare had been such a violent act before, soothes something deep inside her that only he can reach.

Secluded in a cozy farmhouse nestled in a valley, they stand on the brink of a new beginning. For the first time in a long time, she can’t wait to see what the future holds.

* * *

It’s a beautiful day to watch the horses in the pasture.

They’ve brought a blanket out and food for a picnic on an unseasonably warm winter evening and it’s easy to believe for a moment that everything is safe again. That the world isn’tending and they’ve found an oasis.

The baby’s babbling delights Cole, who’s been trying to talk to her since the beginning. It’s been one-sided up until now and he can’t get enough of her silly responses.

“Yep, yep, that’s true. You’re right,” he says seriously, talking to Lucy like she’s an adult, pausing to let her reply with a string of incoherent nonsense while her hands flail in excitement.

“What about that spotted one over there? That’s a good horse too, right?”

Lucy gurgles with a delighted squeal.

“Yeah, I get it. Brown one is shinier. How about we get a cow, too? The brown ones give you chocolate milk.”

Lucy is all for chocolate cows and Olivia laughs. “Keep telling her that and she’ll think it’s true.”

He glances up at her, long hair beginning to flutter into his eyes. “Wanna get in on this debate?”

“No.” She smiles. “You two are doing just fine.”

“Your momma says chocolate milk cows don’t exist, but we’ll show her.”

It’s hard to look away, and as he picks up their conversation again, she’s reminded of the first time she saw him talking to Lucy after passing out in a nursing home from exhaustion. Had only begun to feel the first stirrings of affection for him at that point and then there he was, talking to the baby like she washis.

They haven’t spoken of it aloud, but she’s suddenly overwhelmed with the need to make sure he knows the role he’s been playing is open to him in an official capacity, if that’s what he wants. It seems like an unspoken understanding already, but he is just as insecure about matters of the heart as she is. In a world where tomorrow isn’t promised, they can’t rely onassumptions.

When he veers from cows to first word lessons, trying to get her to say ‘Cole’, she’s given a perfect opportunity.

“You’d have better luck winning this bet if you tried for‘dada’instead.”

“Can I?” he asks carefully, so hopeful that she aches in all those hidden places only he can bring to life.

“Of course you can. You’ve loved her, protected her, saved her life more than once. She already knows who her father is, Cole. I see it every time she looks at you. She’sours, if that’s what you want.”

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