Page 101 of Facing the Line

JONAS

Evan: So how did the big talk go?

Evan: I’m guessing not well since you’re ghosting me.

Evan: Dude, are you okay? Do you still sleep here?

“Mr. Kaminski!” The sharp tone startles me out of my doze and my head snaps off the smooth laminate wood table. Dr. Price, my nursing practice professor, stands over me, glaring.

Shit.

“This is vital information for your future!” His voice rises in pitch and his dark eyes flash. “Or are you too important to pay attention?”

I shift in my seat, posture ramrod straight, and shake my head. Is there drool on my face? “No, sir. Sorry, sir.”

“Athletes.” Muttering under his breath, he stalks back to the front of the lecture hall and my cheeks heat.

I hate that I fell asleep, hate that I’m inadvertently fulfilling the jock stereotype. But I haven’t slept well in weeks. I went for a five-mile run before my classes this morning because I was up early and I thought it would shake me out of my lethargy, but I guess it didn’t. I’m still as exhausted as ever.

Twirling my pen, I pull my notebook closer. No typing—I need to write things down to keep my brain engaged. It’s been so hard to focus lately. Maybe I need to grab some coffee after I survive this class. Although food hasn’t sounded appetizing in a while.

Are these the symptoms of a broken heart? Are we going to learn how to treat this next week? Is there a cure?

Rolling out my neck, I scootch forward to the edge of my hard plastic chair and try to appear like I’m paying attention. Dr. Price is right, after all. It is important information for my future. Now that I’m sure of it, I need to give my nursing classes my all.

With another glare in my direction, Dr. Price reminds us about the assigned reading for the next class and ends thelecture. I blow out a breath and run my hand over my curls. He’s pissed—and I deserve it. It’s disrespectful to fall asleep during class, and I’ve rarely let it happen. What’s my problem?

“You doing okay, Jonas?” Clara, one of my classmates, sidles up to me with a wince. She tucks a strand of her straight brown hair behind her ear and bites her lip.

Standing, I nod and gather my materials into my backpack. “Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.”

“You sure?” She steps close enough that I see the flecks of gold in her green eyes and puts her hand on my arm. “You haven’t been quite yourself this semester. Wanna grab a drink and talk about it?”

“Um.” I rub the stubble on my jaw and stall for time. Is she being kind or asking me out? I can’t tell.

“Or we can go study a little,” she rushes to say, flushing. “Quiz each other over HESI questions. I just thought maybe you’d want to do something with me.”

A perfectly nice, pretty girl is definitely asking me out. I should say yes. That’s the smart choice, right? Move on from Hadley with someone who would be a better fit. Another nursing major, not the sister of a teammate, not someone who will rip my heart out of my chest. Checks all the boxes.

“I mean, it doesn’t have to be right now. Anytime you’re free or available or interested. Or whatever. If that sounds good.” She’s babbling now, and it’s so painful I should take pity on her and say yes. But I can’t force the word out of my mouth.

Because she’s not Hadley. And no matter how sweet or appropriate for me she is, I would want her to be someone else the entire time. And that’s not fair to Clara.

I shake my head. “Sorry, Clara. I don’t think so. I’ve got too much going on with hockey right now.”

Her face falls, and my stomach pangs at the raw disappointment in her eyes. “Oh, yeah. Okay.”

“Thanks, though.” Pushing past her, I hitch my backpack higher on my shoulder and head to the gym. It’s the only place things make sense.

“Hey, man, I’ve barely seen you. You haven’t responded to my texts.” Evan walks over to me in the weight room, interrupting the rep I was counting. “How’s it hanging?”

Grunting, I count out loud to deter him. “Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen.”

I set down my weight to switch to my other arm, but he stands and stares.

“Do you need something?” I ask finally, raising a brow.

Evan takes a step back. “Whoa. What’s wrong?”

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