Page 36 of Steal My Breath Away

“Mostly they’re just lonely people,” he said. “They can’t go out to a restaurant or a movie without everyone gawking at them or asking for an autograph, so they often just stay in or visit with other celebrities. They can’t go out on a date in public without it being front-page news, and even if they book a private room somewhere, they’ve usually got a bodyguard or two watching over them.”

“I can relate,” I said, smiling. “Between you and Matt, it was an effort to have a proper date.”

Puzzled, he frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Sixth grade. Jay Harris tried to kiss me behind the school, and you showed up and told me my dad needed me at home.”

“You were too young to be kissing anyone,” he grumbled.

“Seventh grade. Dev Kumar invited me to go for a walk in the woods and you and Matt just happened to show up on your bikes and decided to walk us home.”

“He wasn’t there to appreciate nature,” Ace said. “I overheard him talking to his friends.”

“High school,” I said, ignoring him. “My first real boyfriend, and yet every time I tried to be alone with him…”

“You and Dan Garcia were a disaster waiting to happen,” he bit out. “He was you but without any modicum of restraint. IfMatt and I hadn’t intervened, you two would likely have wound up in some serious trouble.”

Dan Garcia was the most thrilling person I’d ever met. He would do anything, try anything, break any rule. His brain moved faster than mine, jumping from one crazy idea to the next—climb on the school roof at night, sled down a steep hill into a frozen river, light things on fire—he was particularly enamored of fires. Ace was right. We weren’t good for each other, but damn he’d been a good time.

“Are you talking about the fact he was my first kiss? Do you know how much maneuvering I had to do to be alone with him? Matt’s truck didn’t break down by itself the night of the Halloween dance…”

Ace looked over, his eyes glittering in the dark. “That was you?”

“You weren’t the only one who was good with engines.” I shot him a sly look. “Dan was pretty good with his hands.”

“Don’t tell me things like that. I might have to hunt him down the next time I’m home.”

“Well, then I’d better not tell you about the first time we had sex.”

“He still lives in Riverstone,” Ace muttered, half to himself. “Janice mentioned that he’d worked on her car. He took over his dad’s auto body shop. Maybe he has an accident. Car jack fails. Electric shock. Fire…”

“I snuck him in my bedroom window,” I said smugly. “Matt thought I was all tucked safe in my bed. It made it all the sweeter.”

“God, Haley.”

“That’s what Dan said.” A smile tugged at my lips. “I didn’t even like him that much, but he was willing to climb up the drainpipe and risk being caught by Matt, which made him worth having.” I had been determined not to leave high school a virgin, and since the boy I’d been crushing on since I was old enough to have crushes had dumped me for Esme Duncan, I’d taken what was available and regretted it the next day. I didn’t feel anything forDan, and he didn’t feel anything for me. He loved to experience things, and I’d been a new experience that he didn’t need to have again.

“I miss Matt.” The words dropped from my lips before I could stop them. I never talked about Matt, especially not the stuff that made my heart hurt, but Ace had given me a safe space to say the words that were always there. “He was a good big brother.”

Ace pressed a kiss to my forehead. “He loved you very much, bug. He was always worrying about you.”

“I tried to look after myself, so he didn’t have to,” I said. “After Dad died and Mom got lost in her work, I just—” I drew in a shuddering breath. “I didn’t want to lean on him too much. He put so much pressure on himself trying to be the man of the family. I didn’t want to add to his burden. I didn’t tell him when I was sad or scared or lonely. I let him think everything was fine.”

“He would have been there for you if you’d let him,” Ace said. “He was there for me. Just like you were there for me that day at the creek after your dad died.”

“You cried,” I said softly. “I didn’t realize how much you cared for my dad until that afternoon. And I didn’t know that people like you cried.”

“People like me?”

“Strong and steady. So calm and in control. You seemed a lot older than fifteen. Nothing ever seemed to bother you.”

Ace laughed. “That’s what Matt said about you, when I told him you weren’t acting like yourself after the funeral. I realized that afternoon that I’d never seen you cry. No matter what happened you were always cheerful and upbeat. You never stayed angry with anyone. You’d sulk a bit when your parents scolded you, but then minutes later, you’d be laughing and joking again. Matt said you didn’t feel things the way other people felt them, and they just bounced off you like water off a duck’s back.”

“I feel things,” I said. “But he was partly right. I keep those strong emotions buried deep inside.”

“You could have let them out that day at the creek with me,” he said. “I wouldn’t have judged you.”

“I know.” I leaned up to kiss his cheek before closing my eyes as sleep pulled me under. “But the tears wouldn’t come.”

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