Page 30 of Skating to Him

“Thanks. My dad set me up pretty well when I moved out.” He closed the door and strode into a galley kitchen with white cabinets and dark counters. “You want something to drink? I’ve got iced tea, Gatorade, or bottled water?” He chuckled. “Too early for a beer.”

With a grin, I said, “Yeah, too early. How about a water?” My gaze landed on his round dinette, the same wood color as the tables. “Where’d you get all this stuff?” I placed my hand on the curved back of a dinette chair.

“Dad took me to a furniture store and gave me a budget. This is what I came out with.” He pulled two bottles of water out of a black refrigerator and walked to me. “Here.” He handed me a water.

And his father was a lawyer, so he’d probably come from wealth. Twisting off the cap, I said, “You did a good job. It’s nice and comfortable-looking.” I held up the water to him. “Thanks for this.” I sipped the water.

“Sit on the couch, or would you rather we sat at the table?” His brows wrinkled.

I glanced at each option. The couch would be more comfortable, but it would also tempt me to let my guard down. He wouldn’t make a move on me now, would he? He was over me, wasn’t he? “The couch.” I stepped to it and fell onto the end.

He dropped into the center and drank some water. “So, what are we talking about? Our dynamic on the ice, or…?”

“Our dynamic. Period.” My gaze fell to my lap, and I twistedthe bottle between my thighs. I had no idea how I wanted to start this conversation.

“Okay. I have a few questions.” He bit the side of his lower lip. “This guy in high school. Tell me more about what happened.”

My gaze snapped to his and my lips parted. “Like what?” Why was he going there?

“Were you in love with him? Did he ever come out? What sort of relationship did you have with him?” His face tensed. “’Cause I’m not sure it’s fair for you to have compared me to him.”

My jaw dropped. He was right. I’d never given him a chance to really explain where his head was at. “Uh, okay. Yes, I fell in love with him. If he ever came out, I never heard. He didn’t while we were together. We had a secret relationship, one where everyone thought we were friends, but we fooled around when we were alone.” I sighed as an ache rolled through my chest. “It was my senior year of high school, and he was a football player while I was doing hockey.”

The muscles in his jaw bulged and relaxed. “Did he ever know how you felt? Did you tell him you loved him?”

The ache in my chest heightened. “I did, and he dumped me. He said he didn’t feel the same and what we had was only for fun.” I tightened my hold on my water bottle. Scoffing a laugh, I said, “He started dating a cheerleader after that. It was so fucking cliché, and he flaunted it in front of me every chance he got.” I swallowed.

His forehead wrinkled. “I’m sorry, Tyler. What a douche canoe.” He shifted beside me, wrapped his arm around my neck, and drew me to his chest. “You don’t deserve that.”

Warmth tingled in my heart. It felt good to be in Rowan’s arms. Why did it have to feel so good?

He freed me and pressed his palm to my cheek, his stunning blue eyes gazing into mine. “I take this sexuality thing very seriously, just so you know. I’ve seen what my friend Teddy hasbeen through, and I know what I’d be getting into. Fact is, I’m still attracted to you even though you rejected me.”

I gaped. “I didn’t reject?—”

“Yes, you did.” He pursed his lips. “And it hurt.” He dropped his hand and raked his fingers through his fluffy hair, sinking into the couch. “It’s true I’ve never been with a guy before or really been attracted to one.” He flicked his gaze at me and then toward his lap as he picked at the label on his bottled water. “And it’s also true I fought it at first. I figured I could will it away and not be bisexual. Just keep dating girls and pretend this thing between us never happened.”

I watched him closely. He was pouring his heart out to me. How could I not take this seriously? “I’m sorry, Rowan.”

His gaze softened as it found mine. “I want you to know that I’d rather explore this side of my sexuality with you, but if you don’t want to, I understand.” He shrugged. “Maybe you don’t feel the same way I do.”

“No, I do. I like you, Rowan. Maybe too much, and that’s why I rejected you.” I’d been such an ass. I placed my hand on his thigh. “I’m afraid.” I hung my head. “What if you find out being with a guy isn’t what you thought?”

He set his warm hand over mine. “What if I decide it’s everything I’ve been looking for?” His gaze locked on mine. “I’ve dated a whole lot of girls, but not one of them ever stuck.” He chuckled. “Hell, maybe I’m really gay and just now realizing it?” The corner of his mouth lifted. “We were playing better before we tried to stop this thing between us. What if we see where it could go?”

I stared at him. I’d come here to talk to him, but he’d been doing all the talking. Apparently, he’d done a lot of thinking over the last few weeks. “What are you proposing?”

He twisted his hand and curled his fingers into mine. “Look, if I can’t explore this with you, I’ve decided to see what it’s like to be with another guy. I have to figure myself out.”

Heat swarmed my chest, and I wrinkled my nose. Oh hell no. “You’re planning on hooking up with a guy?”

He nodded, pressing his lips together. “I’d rather it be you, but…”

It was now or never. What did I want to do? Could I take a chance? “Can I think about this? Or do you already have a guy lined up?” I swallowed through a knot in my throat. Was I too late?

“I don’t have anyone lined up yet.” He fixated on my mouth. “When we kissed, it was like something shifted inside me, and I haven’t been the same.”

As my gaze fell to his plump lips, I wet my own. I didn’t think I’d ever wanted to kiss a guy more than in this moment. Should I though?

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