Page 35 of The Fix-Up

“Um, no. I told you, I’m giving up on dating.”

They both ignored me.

“I love this idea,” Mae said.

“We know the kind of guy she needs,” Ali said, her eyes twinkling. “Kind and thoughtful and good with kids and loves her for just being her.”

Mae nodded. “Not just loves her. She needs a man who is crazy in love with her. Who makes her smile and laugh and knows how to take care of her.” Her eyes took on a dreamy haze and I knew she was thinking of my brother. To which I say, gross.

“Oh, yes.” Ali sighed happily and clasped a hand over her heart. “A man who doesn’t try to change her or fix her or anything like that.”

Annnd now Ali was thinking of her husband, Theo. It was kind of annoying to have two of my closest friends be so terribly, horribly, irrevocably in love.

“We should make a list of potential men.” Mae pulled out a small notebook and a pen from her purse.

“Good idea.” Ali paced the floor before she paused and snapped her fingers. “The new city planner in Brookshire is single. I met him last week at a countywide meeting and he wasn’t bad. Put him on the list.”

I groaned. Who wouldn’t want to go out with a guy described aswasn’t bad?

“You know, I bet Chris knows some single guys from the team who would make?—”

I waved a hand. “Do I get a say in this?”

Like a weird, synchronized friendship bot, the two turned to me.

Mae blinked slowly and frowned. “I guess?”

“We should ask her questions, at least,” Ali said. “For research purposes.”

“Fine.” Mae picked up the pen and scribbled something at the top of a new page. “What are you looking for?”

“Someone with a good job, likes children. It would be great if he already had a well-funded retirement plan and owned his own home. Someone responsible and reliable and loyal.”

Ali’s forehead wrinkled. “You’re looking for a man, not a golden retriever, right?”

“Ha. Ha. Yes, a man. I’m not interested in anyone who drives a muscle car or a motorcycle. Definitely no one in a band. In fact, no musicians at all. Tattoos are not a plus. Drinkers, smokers, and wrestling fans need not apply.”

“Chris likes wrestling,” Mae said, rubbing the top of her stomach.

“What about hot?” Ali asked.

“Hot is nice but not necessary. Decent-looking is fine. No horns growing out of his head or whatever.”

“Huh. That’s a big no-go list.” Ali frowned. “I feel like we’re missing something.”

Mae nodded. “We are.”

With a sigh, I leaned back in my seat. “Look, y’all don’t get it. It seems to me you both have made solid decisions when it comes to your love lives. But me? I know it’s a joke, all these horrible dates I’ve gone on, but I can’t seem to help it. I attract the wrong kind of men.”

“That’s not true.” Mae placed a hand on my shoulder.

“Oh, but it is. If there were thirty good men in a room and one jerk, guess which one sees me and thinks, ‘That’s the one?’ The jerk, and I follow right along because he picked me. For a little while, everything is good, and I feel like I’m special and loved. But then little things start creeping in, the little things that show I’m not really anything to them except for ways that are good for them. I’ll let them borrow money or give them a good time and it blows up in my face every time. That’s why, when I moved here to Two Harts, I promised myself I wouldn’t put myself in that situation again. I want a good one this time and if that means I have to wait for it, I will.”

Boy, o-boy, Sunny and I were going to have an epic session later this week.

“I’m so tired of the jerks.” I stared at my hands clenched together in my lap. “I want a non-jerk. That’s all. That’s the only requirement.”

The silence grew but I was afraid to look up and see pity in their eyes. Because that was surely what I would find there.

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