Page 148 of Trust Me Always

Cameron throws her head back and laughs, coffee cup cradled in her hands. They just look so right sitting there together. They fit.

We fit.

My dad’s hand comes down on my shoulder, and he gives a little squeeze. “That look like a girl who won’t understand?”

There’s a little thump in my chest because no, it doesn’t.

She looks like an angel of chaos who wants all my secrets.

Could I tell her? Fillet myself open and let her watch me bleed, the confident, easygoing man she knows me to be turning into a poster child for insecurity right before her eyes?

When she shared with me on the rooftop barn, I almost jumped in and told her, and then last night, I felt compelled to give her a little more, but that conversation was quickly glossed over. For my benefit, of course, because the girl knows me better than any other.

She saw me struggling and gave me an out, which I eagerly took. Maybe I shouldn’t have. Maybe I should have just broke things down for her, filled in all the blanks and shared that the future she’s considering for herself is not that far off from the one I want for myself.

No—notwantbutrefuse to give up.

There’s a make or break for me, but it’s that break part that I’m afraid of.

Still, when I look at her, I wonder if it would have to come to that.

Cameron looks up then, sticking her sock-covered foot out to nudge my mom. They both smile this way, and my low chuckle matches my dad’s.

“Looks like we’re caught.” With one last squeeze, my dad nudges his head in their direction. “Come on. Come sit with your mama for a few minutes before you have to go.”

Nodding, I follow a step behind him, a strange turning in my stomach I’ve never felt when it came to Cameron before but recognize as fear.

Will she blush and avoid my eyes, saying without words that something deeper happened between us last night?

Will she excuse herself and go back inside, giving some explanation that says just as much as her blush would?

I don’t have time to work through any more theories, my dad already stepping out, so there’s nothing for me to do but follow.

He moves over to my mom while I drop beside Cameron, and we look at each other at the same moment.

She smiles brightly, shifting on the cushion to face me better. “How’d it go?”

It’s the perfect reaction, not a single sign that she regrets last night, just fully focused on how my training session went this morning.

As irrational as it is, it pisses me off.

How can she smile at me like it’s any other day? Like she didn’t have my dick in her hands last night? Like I didn’t feel the heat between her legs?

Like she didn’t come with those big blue eyes locked on mine?

She’s acting like nothing happened, like it’s all forgotten, so small of an event that she’s completely unfazed by the sight of me when I’ve been burning at the thought of her all morning, waiting for this moment.

Cameron isn’t the one who gets up and makes some excuse to get away.

I am.

Cameron

He’s totally freaking out. Like epically.

I’m not sure what I expected, but based on how annoyed I am right now, clearly it wasn’t that. I’m not even sad.

I’m just straight-up pissed.

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