Because I can't call this room anything but a cage. Not when the bars mean that we're treated worse than animals.
And because of that we're now both one step away from going crazy, the isolation almost unbearable.
"V," I continue to get her to rouse.
"What…" she mumbles, her eyes sluggish as she tries to pry them open. "Here," I say, getting some water and forcing her to drink.
"You need to hold on, V," I tell her, stroking her hair.
She's been getting weaker and weaker for a while now, and the tests we have to undergo don't help much. Not when every single blood draw weakens even her more.
"I…" She shakes her head, some droplets of water falling down her chin. "I don't know how much longer…" she whispers.
"You need to, V. For me," I take her hand, hooking our pinkies together, "we're in this together. Always," I tell her, desperate to make her not give up hope.
"Always," she whispers, her lips tugging upwards slowly.
Truth is, I don't know how long I can keep this up either. I've been trying to be strong for her sake, but even I am losing hope.
Vanya eventually beats her fever, and color starts to climb up her cheeks. Her mood, though, doesn't improve.
One day, we're picked up by guards and taken to a new room, where two doctors we haven't seen before are waiting for us.
The tests are routine, and we're already used to the blood draws or the weird machines that they put on us. But this time, they also give us some questionnaires and some drawings to interpret.
I'm not exactly sure what this is, but apparently we both pass all the tests, as the doctors inform us that we'd be moved to another facility.
We're both confused at the whirlwind move, everything happening too fast.
Loaded in a black van, we're taken to the next location, but our living conditions don't improve. If anything, they are even worse than before.
The cell is dirty and the food is barely edible. The only difference is that we now have round the clock guards and even more tests.
The first week we're there though, we also get a present.
The first present we've ever been given here.
One of the guards comes and brings in a baby rabbit, telling us that we need to make sure we raise it appropriately.
I'm immediately skeptical, and my suspicion doesn't abate. But the rabbit's arrival makes Vanya break out of her shell and she starts to become more active. She now smiles more, and her mood has considerably improved.
Seeing the changes in her makes me thaw toward the rabbit, too.
"I named it Lulu." Vanya beams at me, holding the already two months old rabbit in her arms. It's definitely growing every day, and I can't believe that they saddled us with another mouth to feed when we barely get enough food as it is.
"That's nice, V." I try to return the smile.
"He likes it when I rub his belly. Look," she giggles, turning Lulu on his back and petting him on the stomach.
I don't know if Lulu is very keen on that, but it makes Vanya happy and that's enough. Though I am a little put off that Lulu's fur is clean and shiny while Vanya's clothes haven't been changed in months.
She's smiling happily in her tattered and dirty dress, a stark contrast to Lulu's pristine coat.
"I can't believe they let us keep it," she whispers, holding Lulu to her chest and cooing softly.
"I don't think we should get too attached, V. I don't have a good feeling about this," I tell her for the thousanth time.
"It's been so long, brother…" She shakes her head. "If they had meant to do something, they would have done it already. It's been months and they've let us keep Lulu," she says, and while I have to agree with her reasoning, I still can't quite feel comfortable.