Page 104 of Between Wrath and Mercy

“Did you have anything to do with that, Mama? Is that what Papa—what he meant?” Elora’s voice was full of accusation.

“I—I suppose I may have had something to do with it, but I don’t know what your father was talking about. He did this to us before I ever—” Her face fell as she watched me, every emotion on her face telling me what she thought of me, what she assumed I’d done. “I had not seen or spoken to Prince Rainier since long before you were born. I only sought him out after you were taken, I swear it.” I looked at Ismene, my brows lifting, begging her to confirm what I said.

“She’s telling the truth.”

“He was the only person I knew who could even help me, Elora. But I hadn’t seen him since we buried Lucia.” Elora’s face turned into something more contemplative, but the furrow between her brows told me she wasn’t sold on my confession.

“And yet, you had something to do with him calling off the betrothal to the Nythyrian princess.” Cyran waited for an explanation I wasn’t willing to give. So I just stood, watching Elora as she pleaded with her eyes for me to explain. I wanted to tell her everything, but I was afraid of sharing in front of Cyran. I offered her as much truth as I could without revealing too much.

“The prince and I, Rain . . .” Her eyes widened at the familiar name. “Rain and I were in love before your Aunt Lucia died, and we parted ways at her burial. I was given to your father, and I never saw or spoke to Rainier again until what, two weeks ago?” I felt the sting in my nose and knew I was on the verge of crying. I didn’t want to tell her any of this in this forced way. Ismene nodded, confirming the truth.

“Wasn’t he betrothed to Aunt Lucia, Mama?” Her eyes flared with judgment and more insinuation.

“Yes, but Lucia was in love with someone else.” She rolled her eyes as if the whole situation was beneath her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“About Rainier?”

“About any of it! The fact you didn’t love Pa—Faxon, that you’d been in love with the Crown Prince!” She was incredulous, and I only realized then how absurd this must be for her. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. “Let alone the fact I’m the gods damn Beloved, Mama!” I’d never heard her curse before that moment.

“Supposedly.” Ismene cut in, earning her a glare from both Cyran and Elora.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Elora. I was trying to protect you, and I guess I was trying to protect myself. Thinking about all of it hurt. Thinking about Rain hurt.” I looked at her pleadingly, hoping she’d understand. “Please forgive me.”

“You’ve kept so much from me.” She shook her head and started for the door, and I let out a sob. The entire room shook, and I fell backward, landing roughly in my chair. Cyran was at Elora’s side, holding onto her, and I watched the soft way she gazed up at him. I was right about one thing at least.

“Where are you?” Prince Cyran cocked his head. I slowly eyed the room we were in, and he gave an exasperated sigh. “Where are you sleeping? Are you safe? The illusion is fighting me.”

“I—” I hesitated, afraid of revealing too much, worried about Elora’s reaction. But the time for lies and half-truths and omissions was over. “I’m safe. Rainier has a home in Astana. I’m asleep there.”

“It would seem he’s trying to wake you.” Cyran raised a brow. “Let’s try to calm down a bit. My illusions work a lot like dreams, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you were crying in his bed right now.” I took a deep breath, avoiding Elora’s eyes. I didn’t deny I was in Rainier’s bed, nor did I plan to. I changed the subject.

“Is the plan the same?”

“Yes. Is the prince sending troops to the Cascade?”

“We are petitioning King Soren tomorrow, but Rainier has the pull without his father if he needs it.”

“Good. Ismene will remain with our brother, helping work against him.”

“Your brother has allied with Olag, has he not?”

“Yes. And based on the fact I already know about the broken engagement; I wouldn’t be surprised if the Nythyrians were to join the fray if they haven’t already.” I closed my eyes, rubbing in between them, realizing my presence might have made this all the more difficult.

“Why don’t you tell me where you are, and we can come get her before the attack on the Cascade ever happens?”

Cyran scoffed. “Declan has spies everywhere. Doing that would get both myself and Ismene killed for acting against him.”

“But he wouldn’t know you told us. Rainier has spies too.”

“It doesn’t matter; I can’t tell you anyway. He had his mindbreaker place a gag on us. If I even try to speak of our location, I’ll stop breathing.”

Ismene nodded in confirmation, and I sighed, dropping my head into my hands.

“May I speak to my daughter, alone?” Cyran glanced at Elora, who hesitated, rubbing her arms before agreeing. The royals walked out of the room, and I wondered how large the illusion was. Would Ismene and Cyran just wander an endless hallway until they were called back in? I waited a few moments before I pulled her into my arms. She fought me at first but then let out a small cry as I wrapped myself around her.

“I’m so sorry, honey. I’m sorry I hid things from you. I’m sorry your father did what he did. I’m trying. I’m doing the best I can.” She sniffled and pulled away from me.

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