Page 29 of Between Wrath and Mercy

“I’m here! I’m here!”

I doubted they could hear me. It might be someone above me, observing the ocean as waves pounded into the cliffs, unaware of my demise in the ground below them. But it wouldn’t explain why it was racing. It had to have been him.

The heartbeat was getting louder.

“Rainier! I’m here!” I was sobbing and screaming, terrified he wouldn’t get to me in time. It was rising too fast, and I had to start treading water, the cave ceiling swiftly approaching. At the rate it was filling, I thought I only had moments.

Our heartbeats echoed, the only sound I could hear over my gasping breaths.

I heard the sound of a rift opening, and it was him. Rainier was here, soaking wet, barely tall enough to stand. But he was here, and he’d found me. He must have rifted into cave after cave, searching for me. He pulled me to him, pressing me against his chest as I let out a sob.

“I’ve got you, Em. I’ve got you.”

Chapter 11

Thenextmorning,Iwoke up frustrated. I hadn’t dreamt about the caves in years, yet the memory had taken over my subconscious. Questioning the man in the cellar was apparently a bad idea. Being around Rainier probably didn’t help, either. I was angry that I kept revisiting old wounds in my sleep. So, when my eyes finally opened and everyone else was already awake, Dewalt and Rainier staring at me, I popped up onto my elbow and lost my temper.

“What? Why are you two staring at me?”

“We were trying to decide who would have the displeasure of waking you up.” Rainier gave me his crooked smile, but it still didn’t quell my annoyance.

“And you both decided to stare at me until I woke up?” I glared.

“Well, we were going to draw lots, but you just looked so peaceful.” Dewalt was sitting in the chair Rainier had slept in, picking at his nails. His raven hair was braided down his back, and I watched as his tongue darted out in concentration.

“We aren’t leaving until midday, to time our meeting up with the guard. We’re used to being on the road. You aren’t. We thought you should get as much rest as possible.” Lavenia’s voice grew softer as she spoke only to me. “You’ve tossed and turned a lot; I know you’re not sleeping well.”

My chest felt tight at the realization she’d been paying that much attention to how I was doing. “Well, thank you.” I inhaled, pulling my emotions together as I sat up and beheld the two men in the room. “I could do without the scowling, though.”

“I’m not scowling.” Dewalt harrumphed. “But if you want me to be honest, I was looking because I’m still in shock you’re even here.” It almost felt like he was expecting an apology.

Lavenia averted her eyes from me, glancing at her brother. He was leaning against the wall across from the bed, one arm crossing his body and the other arm up, a fist resting against his mouth. The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up—the fabric crisp against his brown skin, showing the curvature of his muscles. No one had any business looking so handsome quite so early in the morning. Dewalt might not have been, but Rainier was definitely scowling, his crooked smile replaced by a clenched jaw. His eyes were a mossy green color today, and they softened as they met mine. As I held his gaze, I noticed his jaw relax and the tension release. I never would have imagined myself here either. With people who had been family to me, with a man I thought I loved all those years ago. It wasn’t easy for me either. My heart ached, and I felt my face fall. Rainier didn’t break the contact, continuing to watch the warring emotions crossing my face. Maybe I did owe them an apology. Dewalt and Lavenia hadn’t done anything wrong, it was me. I blinked, breaking my trance, and I turned to Dewalt.

“I know it’s probably strange for you. It’s strange for me too. This is all under terrible circumstances, but—” I paused, taking a breath. The three of them had dropped everything for me the moment I asked. I wondered what would have happened if I hadn’t pushed so hard and so far away from them all those years ago. If I had been able to forgive myself and Rainier, if I was there to comfort my friends and let them comfort me, things could have been different. I wondered if Rainier and I would have been friends, successfully moved past what happened between us. “But I’m glad I’m here. I—I have a lot of regrets.” Dewalt stopped picking at his nails to glance up. He wasn’t smiling, but his frown had lessened. I took it as a good sign.

“Thank you for helping me.” I looked around at the three of them. Dewalt and Lavenia both nodded, but Rainier didn’t indicate he had heard me at all, an inscrutable expression on his face. I wondered if he had regrets too. His expression made me wonder if he knew most of mine involved him. Did he find it as hard to be around me as I found it to be around him? I met his gaze and held it. I wasn’t certain about any of this. There was too much between us—time and pain—to even begin to delve into. I decided it was best not to entertain any of it.

“While Lavenia and I make necessary arrangements, you’ll be training with Dewalt.” Rainier suddenly pushed off the wall, walking to the door. “Unless you’ve been practicing?” He tilted his head, a smile tugging on one side of his mouth. He probably already knew the answer. I glared at him, but I was actually grateful. The scuffle with the men at home had been too close for my liking. I was still good with my bow, but my hand-to-hand combat and sword fighting were lacking. I’d only had Theo to spar with, and it wasn’t exactly challenging to train with him since I’d been the one to teach him what he knew. Not to mention he had quite a few responsibilities, so it had been a while since I’d been able to train with him at all.

Lavenia and I had trained together when we were younger. My father had been reluctant to allow it until Lucia intervened, arguing with exuberance for her protection, and even then, he barely approved. Dewalt and Rainier would take time to teach Lavenia and I outside of our other lessons, Lucia shouting encouragement from under the shade of a tree. I fondly remembered the first time I ever disarmed Rainier. He’d gotten cocky since he had a much longer reach than me. He had attempted an overhanded swing when I was just too far away, and I’d pushed forward at the last second, smacking his sword to the ground. He’d tackled me afterwards, playfully angry he’d been bested. We’d all been in the meadow that day, drinking in the sun and laughter.

“Don’t worry about him. He’s gotten lazy with his sword the more he relies on his divinity.” Lavenia grinned. I was curious to see what she meant. He’d gotten better at rifting, by far. But I wondered what it was he could do that made him less reliant on his sword. I’d seen a bit of it in the cellar, but it wasn’t far off from his capabilities as I’d known them. That reminded me.

“What happened to the deckhand? After the cellar?” I questioned.

“He found himself without a head.” Rainier had the audacity to shrug as he said it. I stared.

“Youkilledhim?” I was shocked. The man was a criminal, but that didn’t mean he deserved death. A vision of Rainier kicking the bound man in the jaw entered my mind, a savagery I’d never seen from him before.

“War has a price, Emmeline. You know that better than anyone. I cannot afford to be weak. The man was a traitor, whether he knew Elora was the Beloved or not.”

I wondered what else he’d done so as not to appear weak. What exactly had earned him the title of the Bloody Prince to the Folterrans? Beheading a traitor was a start.

“You sound like your father.” I knew I was crossing a line, but I didn’t care. King Soren was vicious and ruled with an iron fist. Rainier had always detested his father’s methods, and it bothered me to know he’d do something so much like him. Today wasn’t going to be a good one. I hadn’t even gotten out of bed yet, and I was comparing Rainier to a man he’d sworn to never turn into. His next words chilled me.

“I know.”

DewaltandIwentdown the large hill to a small beach near the docks. The ground was more rocky than it was sandy, but it would do. The port city was built atop the sprawling ruins of a temple created to praise one of the old gods. Within the less populated areas of the city, it was easy to see some of the still-standing ruins upon which Mira had been built. Large slabs of rock, polished by the sea, made up most of the shoreline. We found a flat area, which was no small feat, and cleared out some of the bigger rocks still in our way. Dewalt must have truly lost all faith in me because he told me not to bring a sword, and he only wanted to work on physical conditioning. I knew I was going to be sore after.

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