Page 139 of Between Despair and Hope

“Have to.”

“Don’t say it like that. Not while I’m holding you and my cock is aching to be inside you.”

“Your cock is aching, or you are?”

“You want to argue semantics about this?” He reached down, grabbing his length and rubbing it against my still sensitive clit.

“You know I always want to argue semantics, even if you’re inside me. Even if I’m squeezing you tight, stretching to take you deep—“

“Gods, Em. You’re going to make me finish just from talking that way. Everything is aching. My cock, my gods damn soul. I want to be so close to you, so deep I can’t move, can’t breathe without feeling you. I’m convinced you’re the only reason I exist.”

Notching him at my entrance, I pumped his length twice, and his head tilted back on a groan. But no matter how much I wanted to sheathe him inside me, I wasn’t going to let him get away with this distance, saying nothing.

“Promise me you won’t shut me out again. That you won’t stay away to protect me.”

“I promise I’ll try not to.”

“Not good enough,” I said as I slid my hand down his length, rough. “If you want to sink this thick, perfect cock into my tight, warmcunt,“ I said, enunciating each word with a stroke as I used his own filthy language against him, “Then I need more than trying.”

“Fuck, dear heart, you’re going to kill me,“ he hissed, closing his eyes. “I promise.”

A quick pump of my hand.

”Iswear.”

“Then take what’s yours,” I whispered.

And he did.

In one precise, vicious stroke, he slammed me down onto his cock as his hips bucked upward, lifting me out of the water. Invading and consuming, his body claimed mine, and my fervent heart began to mend. My back arched as I grabbed onto his shoulders, my hair dipping into the water behind me. His thrusts demanded, and my body acquiesced. Opening for him and accepting him, my muscles loosened, and the tension ebbed away. He leaned down, dipping to caress my breasts with his lips, slowing his movements even as I writhed on his hardness. My divinity expanded and glowed on the edges of my vision. I’d never felt so in tune with it. Closing my eyes, I moved my body on his, whimpering as he slowed me, dragging me up and down his length.

“Greedy thing,” he murmured, carrying me to the opposite end of the pool where a rock ledge waited. “You need me just as much as I need you.”

“More. I’ve always needed you more.”

Setting me down on the edge, caging his body around me, he pressed into me so hard I gasped. He was so deep, my eyes rolled, and my head fell back on a moan. My divinity soared and stretched, and I let it crawl to life on my skin. I let it be, didn’t contain it, didn’t ask it to do my bidding. It caressed my skin, raising goosebumps on my flesh.

“You never needed me. Youwantedme,“ he argued.

A deep thrust meant to pierce my heart. He grabbed my legs, spreading me, holding me tightly as he used his cock to give pleasure and proof to his words.

“They’re the same. I wanted you; I chose you.”

I braced myself with one hand on the ground beside me as I wrapped the other around his neck. When he pulled nearly all the way out of me, I looked down, watching as he slammed back in. Seeing my arousal glisten on his length as he disappeared within me turned me molten. It was me soaking into his skin, my body which gave him pleasure, my soul with which his was entwined. Gripping my thighs, he tugged me close, crowding me. Hands moved to my hips as he pounded into me. Forehead to forehead, our breaths mingled as his body slammed against mine. He slid his hand between us, using his thumb to press down on my clit as his hips moved slower against me.

“But you thrive without me, Em. Always have and always will. Me? I’m half a person without you. That’s true need.”

I bit my lip as I looked up at him, the deliberate thrusts while he put pressure on my clit nearly too much. But I still noticed something like hurt dancing in his eyes. And when I saw the vulnerability, he rubbed me with more pressure, wanting to distract me, wanting me to let it pass, but I wouldn’t allow it.

“Every moment we’ve ever been apart, I spent waiting. Wanting to claw my—“ I gasped as his thumb circled faster. “Claw my way to you. To fight you and let me love you.”

“Even after I left you that first time?”

“Yes,” I hissed as he slammed into me once more, my breasts bouncing from the force. “But I didn’t think you wanted me.”

“Then why did you fight me so hard when you found out I did? That I’ve never stopped wanting you?”

“Wanting to love you—“ Thrust. “And fight with you—” Thrust. “Doesn’t negate that you left me.”

---