Page 144 of Between Despair and Hope

Hours later, the two of us stood at the ship’s stern watching the sunset, and I slid my hand closer, where we both gripped the railing. I couldn’t help it as I rubbed my pinky up against hers. I was trying to keep a distance between us until I figured out what she asked of me. Did I want something with her? Did I even know what I wanted? But I’d sat with the thought of her giving herself to her mother for Vesta, and I’d only grown more agitated.

“You’re her last daughter. She’ll probably kill you.”

“She was more fond of me than she ever was of my sisters. It’s possible she won’t.”

“But you threaten her crown by existing, do you not?”

“Ven, tell me, how is a merrow without a pendant going to become the Seaborn Queen? The ability to live in the ocean isn’t a suggestion; it’s a requirement. I am no threat to her.”

“Still though. Why endanger yourself?”

“The seaborn have their own prophecy, you know—about the Beloved and all that nonsense?”

“I didn’t know that. What does it say?”

“It isn’t just about uniting the Three Kingdoms. It means the forestborn and seaborn too.”

“All the pureblood elves are dead.”

“But their children live. Those with elf-blood in their veins. And don’t forget the fae, even if they’ve hidden for centuries. That has to count for something. And if I have the chance to help, I will.”

Spotting a speck of a ship on the horizon, I shook my head before focusing on the black dot. “I don’t want you to help if it means sacrificing yourself,” I mumbled.

“I don’t know if you have any say in the matter.”

“I want say in the matter.”

“It’s too early for that.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re not ready for that with me.”

“What?”

“You only get a say if we belong to one another. You’re not ready for that. Not yet.”

“Says who?” I knew I wasn’t ready, but I wanted to hear why she thought it.

“Says me. And your aura. It’s…brightened in recent days. But I want confident, glowing, and indisputable. Then you can have a say.”

“I’m trying.”

“These things take forever. It’s a good thing we have time.”

“Unless you sacrifice yourself!” I nearly shouted.

“You let me worry about that, sweet.” She put her hand atop mine, and I tried very hard not to think about what I’d do if push came to shove. The Seaborn Queen would certainly kill the only threat to her throne, but would she kill me? Even if the odds were barely better for me than they were for Mairin, I wouldn’t let her sacrifice herself.

Chapter 40

Elora

Iputonandtook off the bracelet no less than a dozen times after Thyra shut my door behind her. Finally, after the last time, I tossed it across the room and watched as it hit the door and slid down. I rolled over, pulling the blankets over me. That damn bracelet had put me in a state ever since I opened his letter.

The villain. The enemy. My murderer, friend, and savior—all in one.

What was I to do with that? Mama had begun to explain over several conversations what Cyran had done and why—but I never listened. I didn’t want to know. She hadn’t been forceful about it, opting not to harass me when I clearly wanted nothing to do with it. But she made it clear he’d had no choice.

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