Page 203 of Between Despair and Hope

“I-I need to tell someone something, but I’m afraid. I thought maybe after this—whatever this was—I could have told you.” She wouldn’t look at me and started scratching at her wrist.

“What is it, Nor?”

“No, I—never mind, it’s not important.” She turned the knob.

I softened my voice as I adjusted my clothing. “You can tell me. Why are you afraid?”

“The things you helped me gather? I’d stolen my mother’s locket the day before Filenti dragged me off. Hid it in my pallet.”

“And?” I prompted as she toed the ground.

“Filenti knew who my father was as well, had something of his, according to my mother. But in the locket were two tiny portraits of my parents. Somehow, I think she still loved him, despite everything. And it’s so tiny, I—”

“Do you know who your father is?” I pushed her toward the point. I needed to rid myself of her before I did something stupid.

“That ball,” she whispered. “I recognized it.”

“The one in Filenti’s drawer?”

“Yes.”

“Gods, Nor. Get to the point.”

She strode across the room, tugging the necklace out of her pocket and opening it as she grabbed my hand and placed it in my palm.

“I don’t remember my father, not really. I remember he was blond, and that’s it. Does that—is that Declan? I never saw him while I was in Folterra.”

I peered down at the tiny image. It was nearly impossible to tell.

“I was born in Folterra, and that ball? Declan had a collection of them, all whittled to perfection in that same way. He gave them to the women he—the novices that he…”

“Divine fucking hell, Nor.”

“He didn’t rape me because I—because I think I am his daughter.”

Chapter 53

Rainier

Elora’sshriekwasbloodcurdling in my ear, and I couldn’t help but laugh as I wrapped an arm around her.

“I’ve got you. I won’t let you fall,” I said, loud enough for her to hear me in the wind. Though I couldn’t quite make out what she muttered in response, I saw her knuckles whiten where she held on to Ryo’s neck and felt her nails dig into the arm I put around her waist. Glancing to my right, I saw Em watching us from where she sat atop Irses, her hair blowing in the wind. It wasn’t as cold as it could have been, but we’d made the dragons stay low to keep us warmer, not wanting to deal with the hassle of divine fire.

We’d only been able to corral the dragons through one rift, and they wanted nothing to do with another. My heart had soared when we worked together to get them through it. The beasts had been sleeping in a cave near the hot spring, and I created a sunken path which rose high to either side, coming straight out of the mountain. They had no choice but to enter it when they came out. I kept the rift open and rumbled the earth beneath them to encourage them to move. Em had covered the top of the path with shadows, hoping they’d stay beneath it, and, thankfully, they had made their way toward the end of our makeshift tunnel. Elora had run along after them, shouting at them and urging them toward the rift. She’d been afraid at first but quickly came around, especially after Ryo licked her, covering her torso and face in dragon spit. She was no longer scared at that point and only wanted vengeance. Sadly, our plan didn’t work a second time because the dragons had all launched into the air the moment they went through the rift.

It had taken Emma shouting at Irses at the top of her lungs for several minutes for him and Ryo to land. The others didn’t risk it. Elora and Em both decided it would be best for Elora to ride with me, and gods, I had been giddy about it.

Her screeching though; I worried for my ears.

As we came upon the outskirts of the capital, people gawked. They’d gotten a glimpse of the dragons when we’d taken them to the hot springs, but with how low we were flying now, the people ran out of their houses to see the visions of fiction in the flesh. Ryo vibrated with energy, and I could tell he wanted to perform some sort of trick because of all the attention, and I clamped my legs tight on either side of him.

“Not now, boy,” I said, leaning forward to pat his neck near where Elora clung tightly.

I visited a few times during those weeks I was avoiding Emma, working on training him for Elora. I’d kept up my visits since we returned from Ravemont, but I hadn’t tended to them as often as I would have liked. He’d made extreme progress. He did even better with Shika’s presence to our left; the blood-red dragon with curling shadows around her body frightened him. Though she looked terrifying, she was quite gentle, and had quickly grown to be my favorite dragon. Irses still hadn’t quite warmed to me, but we had an understanding by now—a begrudging respect. We both were fiercely loyal to the woman who rode atop him, and that was all that mattered.

When we finally landed at the estate, it was midday, and I was beyond tired. We’d been up at dawn for meetings with my council, then Em and I went to retrieve Elora before fetching the dragons. Holding the rift open for as long as I did while rumbling the earth had taken its toll on my divinity, and I wanted to nap.

But I knew I would find no rest, already late for my meeting with Reminy. I slid down off the dragon and helped Elora after.

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