Page 59 of Between Despair and Hope

“What in the most vile of hells were you doing coming into the men’s bathhouse whileI’mbathing?” I shouted back at her while I rubbed my forehead. “I was in here first, you brat.”

“This isn’t—the tall woman, Teeruh or something, she told me...Men are allowed in here?”

I closed my eyes and breathed through my nose, counting to ten.

“You’re telling me you just threw—” I stood, waist deep in the pool, turning to the edge and finding the object in question rolling away from me. Not giving a shit, I gave her a view of my ass as I leaned forward and grasped it. “Why the hell do you have an apple in the baths? You threw an apple at me because you thought men weren’t allowed in themen’sbath?”

She had the decency to blush, and I leaned back, letting my eyes wander now that she wasn’t covered in soot and her own vomit. Dark hair not quite as long as mine hung down past small breasts. Dark, thick lashes framed wide eyes, and a hint of pleasant freckles across her face opposed her down-turned mouth. It made her look younger than she was, as if she were a petulant child. In my periphery, I saw the red swirl of skin on her shoulder and noted it extended almost to her elbow. I didn’t let my eyes linger.

Letting myself smirk up at her, I brought the apple to my mouth and bit down, licking my lips as I raised a brow.

“Not only were you wrong, you thought I would get something out of this? A contrary novice in a towel? Trust me, if I wanted to see a naked woman in the baths, she would have been willing, and I would have done more than look at her.”

She scowled, but her face quickly shifted to a look of horror. “Oh skies, did you hear me singing?”

I laughed, taking another bite of her apple.Myapple.

“I sure did. You mispronounced a few of the words, bird, but overall, a decent rendition.”

Her voice was too good to truly insult, but I was enjoying having the upper hand on her. Her scowl returned in force.

“I did not.” She took a step forward, and I noticed her eyes dip down my chest. The water was up to my hips, but it seemed quite bold for a supposed novice to let her gaze linger. Another reason not to fucking trust her. I decided I was done with the conversation as she continued. “I had an apple because I was hungry, and I planned on eating it in my room after my bath, but didn’t want to stop and drop it off. I figured it could come with me, but to my delight, it helped me against a would-be assailant instead.”

“Do you think an apple to my skull could stop me? Here,” I snapped, tossing the core at her feet. She jumped back when it hit her.

She shook her head, anger crinkling up her nose as her brows met in the middle. “What was that for? What did I do to you?”

I raised a brow before turning to hop out of the pool. Even though I’d left my towel in the antechamber, I didn’t care what she saw of me. Though she was taller than Ven, I towered over the novice at my full height. She averted her eyes, and I was fucking glad she felt uncomfortable.

“You got sick down my back instead of trying to, I don’t know, aim literally anywhere else, and then you told Emmeline something I asked you not to.”

“I said I was sor—” I cut her off as I pushed my way past her.

“But maybe I misremembered it. I am the stupidest man you’ve ever met, after all.”

“Give him a minute,” Lavenia said, pushing past me to shut the door behind her, preventing my entrance into Raj’s study where Rainier waited. “He needed a moment alone. He’s not…He’s not right. Did he let Emma heal him?”

“She started to. I don’t know if she finished. Why?”

“Something he said…” She trailed off. “I don’t know what the hell Declan did to him, and he won’t tell me.”

“He will when he’s ready.”

“Do you think he might have used a mindbreaker?”

“I don’t know, Ven.” I rubbed my face, exasperated. I didn’t know what she wanted from me. “We won’t know until he talks, and he’ll probably tell Emma before he tells us.”

“I’m just worried.” She sighed, leaning against the wall. “Are you coming back to Astana tonight? Nixy offered to rift us. Rainier said he wants to rest before they come back. He doesn’t want to deal with our mother just yet.”

“I figured I’d stay with them until they were ready to leave. You don’t want to stay? What about your army?” I grinned. She laughed, but her smile didn’t reach her eyes. She looked beautiful as always, brown skin glowing in the late-afternoon light from the window, but I could tell she was weary.

“I’m tired. Shivani didn’t stand in my way, not really. She sort of allowed it to happen.” She shrugged. “But you know me. I’m not suited for this. Rainier wants to protect the Cascade for now, in case of retaliation, but he doesn’t need me for that. I just want to go crawl into my bed. Mairin’s probably there, waiting.” She groaned and tilted her head back before looking up at me under heavy lashes. I knew that look.

“What?”

“I know what you like after a battle. I know the bond doesn’t need it, but…”

Gods damn it.

---