Page 104 of Between Fear and Favor

Our bedchamber was cold, and I pulled the blanket over my shoulders. When she reached for my hand and rubbed a soothing thumb over my knuckles, I loosened a breath.

“You went to the temple without me?”

She frowned and began braiding her hair. “Just to help—” At my expression, her words died in her throat, and the frown furrowing her brow turned into a wretched glare until I forced neutrality onto my face. “I didn’t try to use my divinity without you, if that’s what you’re scowling about. I didn’t end up helping at all, actually. But I don’t know if we have time for me to explain everything to you at the moment. Get dressed.”

“Why don’t you try,” I said, as I rose from the bed. It was still dark out, the Shika constellation clearly visible from our eastward facing window.

She followed me to the dressing room and told me of her visit with the goddess. Em’s voice trembled with excitement or fear—I couldn’t tell which—as she spoke of Rhia and Iemis and the love they’d once shared. Despite her haste, I didn’t rush, listening to each word she said as I dressed.

“Why does she think he’s trying to wake Iemis?” I asked finally, as she took a moment to collect herself. Panting, she caught her breath after rushing to get her story out. “I had hoped he didn’t survive Irses’ attack.”

“The man just won’t die, it seems. Rhia thinks Iemis is the god the Supreme plans to ask for favor from. Rain, what do you remember learning about the antler god? The only god I prayed to growing up was Aonara—because of Lucia. I’m afraid my education is lacking.”

“Well, Iemis was supposed to have died, and with the murder of all the forestborn, it was assumed his magick would never grace mortals again,” I said, frowning. “I suppose if he’s entombed, that still holds true. But how can the Supreme break into the tomb that has been sealed by...” I trailed off. “You’re sure it was six gods who sealed his tomb?”

“I’m sure. They all had golden blood,” she responded, passing my boots to me.

Huffing a breath, I raised my brows before kneeling to tie my laces. “I suppose it doesn’t matter. If six different gods locked him in an obsidian casket, how can the Supreme break that seal?”

“That’s why I woke you.” Em didn’t bother changing, which was a shame considering that rancid scent, but I was appeased by her wearing my shirt tucked into her trousers. She had pinned her long braid into a tidy knot, and I was grateful for the vision of her tattoo the hairstyle afforded me. “We need to go to the dormitory to check on?—”

“The novices?” I asked, fastening her cloak around her shoulders. “I’m sure they’re asleep at this time of night.”

“Rhia thinks they’re dead. She?—”

“Thinks or knows? She is a goddess, is she not?”

“I don’t know, Rain!” Em snapped. “Would you let me speak without interrupting me for just a moment?” I thinned my lips, knowing I’d deserved her irritation. Lifting my hands in surrender, I didn’t say a word. The corner of her mouth twitched as she continued. “Rhia doesn’t want to risk revealing herself, for fear of what they might do. But she saw through the eyes of one of her harrowers.”

She tilted her chin the slightest bit, expectantly waiting for my input.

“I wasn’t aware that was possible.”

“I wasn’t aware that many things were possible until recently. One of the babies has her gift. Declan’s child. She wasn’t sure exactly what she was hearing, nor did she know where they were, but they’ve been taken.”

“How?” I demanded. “Perhaps more importantly, why?”

“I imagine when we were distracted with the walls falling down and our enemy infiltrating the city. I...” She trailed off, chewing on her lips, and that sticky despair nearly overpowered the scent of the draíbea. “We need to go find out. I need to see if...if I’ve failed them once more.”

There wasn’t anything I could say to soothe her, so instead I caressed the bond between us. If she had failed, so had I. Em wasn’t used to holding so many lives in her hands. The weight of our duty and the manner in which losses would gnaw on the weakest parts of us was all new to her. Truthfully, it was new to me as well.

I had never wanted to wage endless war like my father, and my first responsibility as king had been to do just that. There had always been some small level of disassociation involved when my personal soldiers died in battle—but, in becoming king, it had become even more difficult.

Even having prepared for it my entire life, it was no small task. To weigh the lives of each soldier in my army alongside the people they sought to protect was unfair. I wondered if Em would ever be truly capable. Despite our best efforts, people would slip through the cracks of our best defenses. If I allowed each loss to take pieces of me, without the protection of an armored heart, I wouldn’t be capable of taking care of anyone.

But I couldn’t blame her for feeling so fully.

“As for why,” she said, quiet and thoughtful as she glanced out the window. “I have suspicions. I think at this point, it’s clear that Declan was Tannyl and Larke’s son, not Dryul’s.”

“A safe guess,” I murmured.

“Rhia named his ancestor the Warden of the Font. I don’t know what that means, but she said it would require sacrifice. Perhaps...I don’t know. We know they wanted Nor. What if...”

She trailed off, swallowing hard and refusing to make eye contact.

“You think he might sacrifice them? But Iemis’s magick was life and growth. Why would he—” My mouth dropped open, and I stopped speaking, realization dawning. “It’s just divinity. It isn’t magick. It’s just divinity of a different sort.”

Em finally looked at me, turning suddenly. Her hands shook as they grasped mine.

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