Page 151 of Between Fear and Favor

“What’s the matter?” I murmured, slowing my steps as Thyra blazed ahead. Unhooking her ax from her belt, her mouth slipped into a straight line.

“Cy?” I called, and he lifted his head. Tears streamed down his face. His hazel eyes were greener than usual, and he sniffled.

“Don’t,” he said, unfolding long legs to stand. “They’re all dead.”

“Who? What?”

“The novices. The children. They’re all dead. My nieces and their mothers.”

Thyra marched past him, and pulled her tunic over her mouth as she stepped over the threshold.

“What in the gods’ name do you mean?”

“I-I don’t know,” he said, wiping his hand over his brow. “There’s blood everywhere. There aren’t any bodies, but there is a stench...” he trailed off.

He was shaking, and I stepped forward to grasp his hands in mine. They were cold, and Cy’s face had grown pale.

“I think you need to sit back down,” I said.

“No, Elora, don’t you see? I can’t sit. Not now.” Wrenching his hand away from me, he began to pace. His black shirt was tucked in at his trim waist, and his black trousers and boots were clean and tidy, but his hair was a disheveled mess.

As he paced, he pulled his fingers through it, and he appeared almost mad. He tugged at the long necklace hanging down the center of his chest.

“I don’t understand what happened,” I said. Thyra walked back outside, her face grim.

“Princess, I need to go look into this?—”

“Oh gods, when he mentioned the children this morning, I hadn’t realized—” Cy began, stopping abruptly in his pacing. “Elora, I have to go.”

He turned, biting his full, pillowy lip. I couldn’t think about how it had felt against mine—not right now.

“What do you mean you have to go?” I demanded. Thyra stepped away, still hovering nearby. She seemed torn between reporting what had happened and staying with me.

“They saved the children. That must have been who...I hadn’t understood what he meant, but it makes sense.” Cy ran his hands through his hair once more, eyes wide and wild. “I have to go,min viltasma. I’m sorry.”

“Stop, Cy!” I said, grabbing his wrist as he turned to leave. “Explain, please.”

“I have to help the rebels. They need me. They need a king,” he said, and as he spoke, his posture pulled taut. As if the mere acceptance of being a king had made him into one. “Your parents saved those little girls, but who will save my people?”

“You’re going to fight?” I asked, surprised. He had seemed content to let things play out in whichever way the gods saw fit. I couldn’t say the thought of him leaving and joining battle didn’t terrify me, but part of me felt some pride over who he was becoming.

“Yes,” he whispered, pulling my hands into his. “I have to fight for what is right. I have to give Folterra a chance to be better than this,” he said, gesturing toward the building behind him.

“When?”

“Now seems as good a time as any.” He wouldn’t meet my eyes. “Nixy is leaving tonight, and it makes sense for me to go with him.”

“What about the roses? They need the winterfrost roses, but I don’t know how to get them there.”

“I handled that this morning, Elora,” he said, a small smile lifting his lips. “I appeared to your father in a dream to coordinate our efforts. Nixy is bringing the roses to them at Nara’s Cove.” Before I could interrupt him to ask, he continued. “And the blooms from Faxon’s grave, just as you suggested.” Though I wanted to pepper him with more questions about my parents and Nara’s Cove, he squeezed my hands, searching my face for my reaction. As if he wanted my approval.

I wanted to speak to my parents, but I couldn’t be upset with Cyran. Though I’d been wrong for judging how he grieved, it was nice to see him care. Pulled from his grief, he had something to work toward.

But I didn’t want him to go, either.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” I asked, my emotions warring. How could I stand against a king who’d just decided to fight for his kingdom? But also, how could I stand idly by when the man who had stolen my heart raced off to a battle I wasn’t sure could be won?

“I have to, Elora.”

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