Page 158 of Between Fear and Favor

“Skies above, Dewalt. Stop, it feels too good.” Instead, I squeezed her hand to reassure her. “My legs are shaking.”

“That’s the point.” I kissed her gently, slowing my movements, knowing that her hand in my hair would easily pull me off her if she truly wanted me to stop. “You’re close. Just breathe through it. Remember how good it felt, Nor?” She whimpered and nodded before I returned my attention to that sweet, sensitive spot, pumping my fingers inside her as I did it. I could feel her clenching around me, and I knew just how close she was. Her breathing was rough, and she pulled me closer against her.

I nibbled and sucked on her clit, pumping into her wetness, and she finally crashed, her legs shaking and a high-pitched moan escaping those beautiful lips. I would never tire of seeing her fall apart. Her thighs twitched, pressing closer to either side of my head, and I slowed my movements. I felt her pulse around my fingertips while I gently licked her, easing her through the lingering pleasure. She almost slid right off the desk, and I held her steady the best I could considering how tightly she was still squeezing my free hand. When I slowly withdrew my fingers, she groaned, and actually did slide off the desk, lowering to her knees on the wooden floor and collapsing against me.

I held her tight, wrapping one arm around her waist as I brushed her hair over her shoulder. When she murmured my name against my neck, I decided I’d never heard a more beautiful sound. I sank back on my heels. I could’ve stayed there, her warm body in my arms, and built a home. She was shaking slightly, and I gently pulled her head away from my neck to look into her eyes.

“Are you all right, Honor?” I whispered it, the name soft on my lips. I didn’t know why I used her full name, just that it felt right. Like I’d seen all of her and wanted her for every part. And I did; I did want every part of her. I wanted her sarcasm, her wit, her anger; I wanted her patience, her protectiveness, and her tenderness. I wanted to know all of her parts like they were my own.

And I’d never wanted that with anyone before. Not even Lucia; I’d imagined a home with her—children and normalcy. But with Nor, I imagined alife; unpredictable and joyful and hard—all at once. Just like she’d said. I’d imaginedlove. When she gently pressed her lips to mine, threading her shaky fingers behind my neck, I couldn’t wait to voice words which had been waiting all along.

“I’m very good.” She pulled back and gave me a sheepish smile as she whispered her answer. “Thank you.”

“It was my…honor.” I said, instead of the words battling for freedom. I tried so damn hard to keep a straight face—really I did—but my grin broke free. Her eyebrows shot up, and her mouth dropped open.

“You’re not funny, you know,” she said through a laugh, slapping at my chest.

Nor stood, adjusting her nightgown, and her eyes met mine. She swallowed, and before I could ask if something was wrong, she lifted the hem of the gown. When she turned, placing the shift on top of the parchment we’d made a mess of, she revealed more of her scars to me. Mottled, slightly pinker skin wrapped from the outside of her right thigh, back across the swell of her perfect ass, and up her back. Even Faxon, the man who’d sold Elora to Declan, hadn’t done something so horrendous to his daughter. I wished I could raise Declan from the dead and kill him with my bare hands. I gently reached out, touching the discolored skin, and she tensed. Using my other hand to hold her hip, I gently traced my thumb across her scars, and she let out a hiss.

“I’m sorry, does that hurt?” I slid my hand that traced the marked skin up to her other hip, not wanting to cause her pain. She wasn’t moving, her hands loose at her sides as she stood there. I was impressed she wasn’t trying to cover up, though I supposed I did just have my tongue inside her.

“No. I just—you’re only the, what, third person to ever see them? My mother and the queen. And now you. It’s a bit...scary.”

I squeezed her hips as I leaned down, pressing a kiss to where the soft met the rough. She inhaled a deep breath, and I placed another kiss just above the first one. There were some darker spots that stood alone on her soft, unmarred skin. I tried not to think about why, tried not to imagine hot oil pouring down over a child, a rogue droplet splashing away from the rest. Gods. I shut my eyes tight as I pressed a kiss against those spots. She’d worn the marks on her body and the marks they left on her soul for decades, and she didn’t let them turn her ugly in any way.

Nor was beautiful—in mind, body, and soul.

And she was mine.

I kissed farther up, my fingertips sliding up her sides. I wanted to keep worshiping her with my lips, showing her how I felt about every part of her. Leaning forward, I continued my path. My lips moved over the small of her back and my hands roamed up her hips to her waist. I pressed my lips to the lowest mark, just at the top of her ass, unable to stop myself. One of my thumbs gently slid past the marked skin as I moved upward. The discoloration stopped almost exactly at her spine, one side paler smooth skin, and the other the evidence of the evil that had happened to her. And yet here she stood, whole and healthy—mine.

“You’re a dream, Nor. One of those you mourn to leave.”

I stood slowly as she laughed, bashfulness and something else forcing a joke past her lips. “More like a nightmare.”

I didn’t like it. How many cruel fools had said things about her scars in the past? How many rude comments had she withstood to create the cool armor of humor that she donned so easily?

I kissed the top of her spine, gently moving my hands down her arms, one smooth and soft, one textured and mottled. The duality of her skin matched the personalities she showed to the world. She hid her scars like she hid her anger and frustration from everyone else. But from the very beginning, she’d spoken her mind to me, matching my tone with hers, my anger with hers. She felt safe to show those parts to me, because I had them too.

How could I have ever thought I’d be able to walk away from her?

I turned her gently and looked down into her eyes, wide and trusting, as I cupped her face.

“You’re my dreamandmy nightmare. You scare the fuck out of me, Nor. But I don’t want to wake up.”

She stared at me for a moment, and I thought maybe I’d fucked it all up by saying that. But then she threw her arms over my shoulders and jumped, wrapping her legs around my waist. I stumbled backwards, struggling to plant my foot, as she pressed her lips against mine. I gave a surprised laugh, and she pulled away.

“Make love to me. Make me yours.”

My mouth went dry, and I nearly dropped her. “Are you sure you really want that?”

“I can’t remember a time when I didn’t.” She tugged my lip into her mouth with her teeth, then sucked. I glanced around the study in a panic. I didn’t want to take her for the first time standing in the middle of this poorly furnished room, but I didn’t know if I had much of a choice. The small sofa in the corner certainly wouldn’t withstand our weight. “I’m not leaving this room until after I’ve had you, so figure it out,Walt.”

My dick was hurting, straining against my pants, aching to push into that heat just on the other side of the fabric. Desperate to touch her.

Touch.

I had an idea.

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