Page 94 of Loving Bad
"It will be fine," she said, trying to soothe me, but her words didn't ease the growing horror building up inside of me.
"Are you sure this is the way to do it?" Matthew asked Connor, not convinced they were doing the right thing. I felt hope rise in my chest as I held my breath, hoping my brother wouldn't make me leave the apartment.
"We have to do something. She can't spend the rest of her life holed up in her room," he explained.
Nerves mingled with my fear as I walked beside Matthew and Connor, with Jordan following behind us to the college. I held on to the strap of my bag and dug my nails into the palm of my free hand.
As we walked, my eyes raced from one stranger to another, trying to read their body language to see if they were a threat to me. A few stopped to stare at me and I tried my best to ignore them. Word about what had happened had gotten around campus.
A hand softly touched my back and my eyes shot to Matthew.
"It's okay," he assured me gently, his eyes seeing my fear.
I gave him a nod as I bit down on my lip, trying to keep my emotions from taking over. I didn't want to be scared anymore—I wanted my life back—so, despite my fear, I put one foot in front of the other and I walked to my first class.
"I'll see you later," Jordan said as she hugged me goodbye. "Call me if you need anything."
I watched as she disappeared down the hallway to her first class.
"You'll be okay," my brother assured me as he hugged me.
My throat was too clogged with emotion to be able to reply, so I nodded my head.
"I'll see you back at the apartment later," he told me as he released me.
Alone with Matthew, I turned to face the door to my first class of the day and I hesitated. A warm hand enveloped mine and I looked up at Matthew.
"You can do this," he told me softly. I wasn't so sure, but I took a deep breath to try and ease the growing panic spreading inside of me.
Slowly, Matthew opened the door and walked in first. He continued to hold my hand as I took one step followed by another. My heart was pounding in my chest and it felt like I could hear my heartbeat echo in my ears. As I got closer to my usual seat, I saw Caleb notice me. He smiled and stood up.
"It's good to have you back," he said to me when I got to my seat.
Despite all the emotions drowning me inside, I gave him a weak smile.
"I'm glad to be back too," I lied. Despite my fear, I knew the only way to get my life back was to fight for it.
I'd survived the horrific murder of my parents. I'd survived being kidnapped and beaten by a crazy stalker. I was stronger than I ever thought I was and there was no way I was going to let my fear rule my life.
The first day back at college was the worst, but I pushed through it with the help of my family and friends. Each day my fear began to ease and I began to settle back into college. The stares and whispers began to die down as well and my kidnapping became old news.
The fear would never completely go away, but I found ways to deal with it. When I felt things were becoming too overwhelming, I would try and breathe through it. I tried not to concentrate on too many things when I felt like this. It was easier to concentrate on one specific thing and try and work my way through it.
It also made me realize how lucky I was to have a brother who dropped everything to be there for me. He'd rescheduled his life to make sure he could be around while I got my life back on track. I was surprised that he hadn't tried to move me back home. It was like he'd realized that I was an adult and I had my own life to live.
Matthew and Jordan were great friends to me. They were so supportive and understanding. I didn't know what I'd done to deserve such good friends.
One afternoon two weeks after my kidnapping, I was finishing up some homework in my room when I heard someone knock on the front door. I wasn't expecting anyone and I knew Matthew, who was in the living room, would answer the door.
I heard Matthew greet the visitor, but I never heard a response. Distracted, I tried to focus on what I needed to finish.
"Tay."
The sound of Sin's voice saying my name washed over me and made me look to my doorway where I saw Sin standing there with a folder in his hands. Stunned at his unexpected visit, I stood up and crossed my arms.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, feeling my heart begin to race at the sight of him. Any time that had passed since I’d seen him hadn’t eased the effect he had on me, or my feelings for him.
He looked tired and his normally neat hair was slightly messy. I had to fight the urge to touch him.
