Page 94 of Dance with Me on New Year's Eve

He nodded once and reached out to take my hand.

“But … how could this be?”

It couldn’t be.

Could it?

“You’re Danny?”

“Also known as CastGamer55,” he said, squeezing my hand.

“Youare the guy I’ve been talking to almost every day formonths?You?”

Uncertainty clouded his face. “Are you disappointed?”

I shook my head. “None of this makes sense. You can’t be—you can’t. And yet here you are, and he’s not.” My voice reached a higher pitch. “I don’t understand how this is possible. If you’re Danny, that would mean …” I trailed off, staring into his handsome face and seeing it anew. A cold shiver ran down my spine as I glanced down at our joined hands. “You knew.”

He nodded and squeezed my hand again.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, anguish seeping into my tone. I dropped his hand as if scalded and stepped back. “Is this some kind of trick? Oh, look, Roxy’s such a fool as usual.”

His eyebrows lifted as he shook his head rapidly. “No, it’s not like that. I wanted to … I wasn’t sure how I felt until a couple of months ago and then—”

My eyes flashed. “You’ve known formonths? Or did you somehow plan this? Have you known all along?”

His jaw tensed. “Only since November.”

I gasped. “Before Thanksgiving?”

“Yes.”

My mouth hung open for a long moment before I pressed my lips together and asked in a low voice, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Initially, I was in shock.” He rubbed his jaw. “I wasn’t surewhat I felt or what to do about it.”

My lips were set in a thin line. “But you ultimately decided the best decision was tolieto me.”

He frowned. “I wouldn’t say that. It was—”

“Just stop,” I said, shaking my head as my body raged with mortification and fury. “What an idiot you must think I am. An utter fool.”

He placed his hand on my arm, but I shook it off. The frown lines on his face deepened. “Not at all. I thought I made my feelings clear earlier—”

I scoffed. “For all I know, you like to date girls who are stupid fools. How would I know? I don’t know you at all, do I?” My voice was shaking as I spoke, but for once, I didn’t care.

His eyes shuttered as his jaw tensed, but he said nothing.

Despite the humiliation coming in stronger waves now, I mustered as much anger and scorn as I could while glaring at him and then turned on my heel and speed-walked away. Jeff didn’t deserve to see the devastation setting fire within me and the betrayal threatening to consume me.

I heard my name once or twice as he followed, but he lost me in the crowd as I found my way outside, just before the hot, angry tears started to fall.

Chapter 26

I’d dealt with a lot of mortification, shame, sadness, and a host of other negative emotions in my life, more than my fair share. Butnothinghad prepared me for this level of devastation and heartbreak—not even the wretched guy from college who’d broken my heart. I hadn’t loved him. Maybe, in hindsight, I hadn’t even liked him that much. But Jeff …Danny… the pain was unbearable.

I had trusted them. Him.

When Hazel and then Mari called me on New Year’s Day, I put on the best performance of my life. I assured them I was fine. Better than fine. After all, I reminded them, I usually loved spending the holiday setting New Year’s resolutions—at least that wasn’t a lie. And then I turned my phone off for the rest of the hazy week that I spent mostly in bed, with tears and makeup residue streaked on the pillow and hair matted to my face. After eating my weight in corn chips one night while furiously swatting at the tears still pooling in my eyes, I thought about cutting my hair off, but I was too lazy to go find scissors. Being the cliché I was, I returned to bed and tried to shut out the voices in my head replaying all my interactions with CastGamer55, especially since November.

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