Page 40 of Fast and Dirty

“Men are the worst,” Agnes declaresfrom the doorway, a hand on her hip and the other holding her near empty glass of libations. “Come stay with Granny for a while and you’ll be over that doucheface in no time,” she instructs.

“Oh Agnes,” his voice drops to a low baritone, thick with emotion as he walks over to her folding her in his man-ish arms.

“Yeah, yeah,” she gives his arm a pat before turning. “Follow me.”

Toby and I gather up all the bags and dutifully follow her inside.

“It’s not like you to surprise people,” I say to Toby as I set one of his suitcases at the base of the stairs.

“I texted you, boo,” he lets out a flustered sigh. “It’s not like you to not respond within fifteen seconds.”

“What? No you didn’t…” I turn towards the kitchen and go to swipe my phone off the counter. When I check and double check our thread I feel vindicated as I hold the screen up for him. “See? The last message is from yesterday.”

But he’s all ready to return fire and holds up his own phone for inspection. “I sent it to you and you haven’t even read it. See?” He returns with a deadpan.

My stare darts between both screens and their concrete evidence and my mind starts to enter the Matrix when I realize.

“Dad turned my phone off!” I gasp, horrified. “He had my phone disconnected! Oh my god!” I start pacing. “That son of a bitch!”

Toby holds a hand to his mouth, looking at me with worried eyes. I don’t care that my dad cut off my finances; leaving me to fend for myself. But my phone?! That’s just taking it too far!

“Okay honey, clearly we need to lean on each other right now,” Toby closes in, taking hold of my shoulders and leveling me with awe got thislook.

“And whiskey!” Agnes yells from the other room.

“And whiskey,” Toby amends before slightly wincing at the concept. “Or some strong margaritas. Look, let’s go out and getyou a new phone service, and then you can show me around this charming town,” he says, in business mode.

“Okay,” I nod at him, feeling reassured.

“Andthenwe’ll get drunk.”

“Agreed.”

“I can’t believe that bitch!”Toby splutters against his handkerchief. I pat his hand that’s tucked around my arm. After getting my phone reinstated and resuming my text war with West, I’ve been showing Toby around Coyote Creek - well, the parts I know so far. “I need to sow some serious oats. I need to get wasted and go home with a stranger. I need to blow money! I need…”

His footsteps falter before coming to a stop and I follow his gaze across the street.

What has him mesmerized is a small establishment across the street with the words: Hattie’s Hawt Dawgs painted in a happy red above it.

“There,” he draws out dreamily as his eyes widen enough for the anime variety. “Talk about a sign from the universe! I need to go there!”

Releasing my arm, he bustles across the street to the front door, his hips swishing like he has a motor hidden in his pants.

“Toby?” I check for cars and then dash after him.

“Why didn’t you tell me this town had a strip joint?” He demands once I catch up to him. “This is exactly what I need!”

“I didn’t know,” I pant as I look from him to the door and back up at the sign again. “I’ve never seen this place before.

And that name…Hattie, Hattie, Hattie- come on, Kira,think! “What makes you think it’s a strip joint? In a tiny town like this?”

His eyes roll impatiently. “Honey, you’d be surprised where they tuck these little gems away. And Hawt Dawgs? Come on! It’s too easy!”

Before waiting for any further debate from me, Toby whips open the door - which of course, jingles - and darts inside. I’m not even through the threshold before I hear a scream that I can’t tell is delighted or horrified, but unmistakably belongs to my BFF.

In the small foyer, I look either way before I find him to my left, standing in an archway facing a row of styling chairs, each paired with a large mirror surrounded by light bulbs.

“It’s a salon?” I peak around Toby’s frame when I see something move in one of the empty chairs.