Page 5 of Cam Girl

Maxxx8U: I’ll know who you are.

My heart stops.

I’ve never had to block a user before. I’ve gotten pretty decent at working my way around things that made me uncomfortable. It’s the kind of thing you have to get used to doing or else you’re not going to make it long in this business…or life in general.

I shake my head. “Sorry. There are times I’m a good girl and other times I’m nothing but bad. I don’t always follow orders.”

I lean in closer to right click his username and eject him from the room.

Still, the sickening slime of fear sticks with me and coats my tongue and the roof of my mouth. I’ll have to figure out what to do to return the money. There’s no way I’m going to keep it. Morally speaking?—

I cut off that line of thinking and force myself to take my place in front of the camera again.

“We’re still rolling, guys. Hopefully we can all have a great night.”

Thank god they can’t see that I’m shaking.

I’ve had some weird requests before but none of theminvolved genital mutilation. Isn’t that what he wanted? For me to hurt myself? Cut myself open while he watched?

What kind of person asks those things, and has the money to back the request?

I finish up the work for the rest of the night and click off with a kiss to the camera.

“See you next Tuesday, all you naughty guys and gals.”

The remote is tucked in a small pouch looped to the back of the chair and I grab it, clicking off the live feed and waiting for the red camera light to die. Once it does, once I know I’m free, I slam the laptop screen down, flick the camera across the room, and suck in a breath that burns all the way down.

Christ Almighty.

I yank off the wig and toss it aside, out of sight, before dropping onto the bed. Goosebumps blanket my arms and the tops of my thighs.

“Shit.” My voice trembles, adrenaline crashing through me.

Fumbling for the nightstand, I grab my glasses, pushing them on my nose so I can go back to being Gillian Kerrigan rather than a cam girl. Without the red wig, and without the help of a straightener, my hair is a normal wavy brown.

I need the cash but is the cost too high?

What did Mom always say? Some cliché about if you stand for nothing you fall for everything? Feels like an empty platitude right now.

I try not to think about my family while I’m doing my work but right now, thinking about her is a comfort when I need one.

I force myself to double check the locks on the door. The area might not be in the best place but locks on the doors and windows go a long way for peace of mind.

The dude’s threat sticks with me. It plasters to the inside of my mind when I’m in bed, freshly showered and dressedin my pajamas, staring at the cobweb-like cracks on the ceiling.

The job pays well enough and gives me time during the day to work at the clinic. You’ve got to take the good with the bad, right?

And the bad can sometimes be excessively bad.

It’s given me enough of a financial break to be able to rent this place. It’s the first apartment I've ever had to myself, in an okay neighborhood, where I have the privacy I need for my account, and no roommates.

So who would even know if I needed help?

No one.

The splintering crackof shattered wood rouses me out of sleep. Swimming up through unconsciousness, it could be a dream.

It could also be a neighbor in another apartment, or a television amped up for the hearing impaired, or random noise from the street. It could be anything.

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