Page 44 of Love in the Countdown

That was a good question, but I’m not sure she’s ready for that answer. If anything, I might send her running scared if I admit how I really feel about her.

“I needed her to know that I was never getting back together with her.” I gestured to myself, indicating my fresh change of clothes. “She obviously wasn’t happy with the news.”

“Oh.” Her tense shoulders relax.

“Say something,” I plead as I study her guarded expression.

After a contemplative moment, she looks at me, and I swear I feel her digging through the depths of my entire existence with her beautiful brown eyes.

“Do you still love her?”

“No.” I shake my head. “It was a moment of weakness, but I don’t love her. I haven’t loved her in a very long time.”

Emily nods absently and pets Buffy as she considers my words.

“Okay.” She licks her dry lips.

“Okay?”

“I believe you.” She offers a tentative smile.

Hearing those words does something to me. My heart, which had been weighed down with guilt, feels lighter with her acceptance. I had expected Emily to cry or, hell, yell at me for keeping this from her, but she’d done neither of those things.

I’ve been so conditioned to expect the worst from women, so I’m not sure how to handle Emily’s acceptance. Did she forgive me for keeping the messages from her? I hope so.

“Oh, can I ask you something?”

“Yeah. Anything.”

“Why do you call me tiger?”

“Well, for starters, it’s because you’re fierce like one.” I pause as I think about my next words. “And I admire your strength in being able to pick yourself up and move on. I don’t think a lot of people could have done what you did in your situation.”

“You really think so?” She bites her lips as she considers my words.

“Yeah, I do.” I stand up. I want to go to her, but I also respect that she may need some space from me right now. She stares up at me, and I fall into her eyes.

She stands up slowly, picking up Buffy and setting her to the side. She takes a step toward me, and I lurch forward and embrace her. I hug her to my chest, breathing in her scent. It feels like the first breath I’ve been able to take all day.

“I’m sorry for not telling you sooner,” I murmur into her soft hair.

“I’m disappointed you didn’t tell me sooner,” she admits, her words muffled against my chest.

“I know.”

I vow in that moment that I would never disappoint her ever again.

31

emily

Spring is in full force, with birds chirping outside our windows. The weather has warmed up significantly, and the brighter sunshine days have been a welcomed relief. I wouldn’t mind spring so much if it weren’t for all the rainy days. I’ve enjoyed seeing the town come alive with activity once winter finally released its icy grip on the world. Storefronts have their welcome signs out on the clear sidewalks, and fresh flowers bloom all along the town green. People are walking around the neighborhood more and are even friendlier than they have been.

Today’s an exciting day for the town as it’s the annual Bramblewood Day. It’s a day for all the local shops and vendors to display their goods at the town square under tents to avoid the direct sunlight beaming down on everyone. The event also hosts multiple food trucks and kid-friendly activities and rides. It’s like a miniature carnival, and I didn’t know this existed until I happened upon a flyer while Ben and I were browsing the shops the other weekend. We walked over from our apartment and sampled some snacks from the food trucks while browsing the vendor tents.

I’m looking at a painting of a naked woman being embraced by a demon with black wings. I’m not sure where Ben went, butas I am about to ask the shop owner about the price, someone calls my name. Turning around, I come face to face with the last person I want to see.

“Emily, I thought that was you.” Logan smiles at me warmly, like he has never been happier to see me. He moves to give me a hug, and I stand there in shock as his arms wrap around me. He pulls away after an awkward second but keeps his hands on my arms as he looks down at me. “It’s so good to see you.”

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