Page 78 of Need You to Choose Me

She’s right. “I want to make it up to you.”

“How can you do that, though? What’s done is done. We can’t go back. You can’t fix the trust issues that night gave me.”

“Does it have to be done? You said yourself Bodhi and you are friends. Is there somebody else stopping you from at least entertaining this?”

“Yeah. Sebastian. Remember him?”

If she thinks her brother is going to stop me, she’s wrong. “You’re an adult. You can do what you want, Olive.”

I let her think about it. Because I mean it. I want her here. I want to be selfish and spend time with her. More than that, I want her towantto come. When the seconds tick by and she still hasn’t answered, anxiety slowly bubbles in the pit of my stomach.

But then she says, “I’ll have to get time off approved through Judy first. If she can’t find help, I won’t be able to. Not before classes start.”

She wants to though. She’s willing to try.

That means something.

“Okay.” I swallow the lump in my throat. “Okay. Just let me know. I can give you gas money. Whatever you need.”

She snorts. “I don’t want your money, Alex.”

I smile. “I know.”

That’s the best part.

“You know what I want?” I ask her.

“Probably something dirty.”

I grin. “That too. But, no. I just want you, Olive. Wish I’d been smart enough to hold onto that before.”

A subtle breath escapes her. “Alex…”

“Nah” I cut her off. “You don’t need to say anything. I just wanted you to know. Youneededto know. Just think about it. If you and Hoffman aren’t a thing, this is me officially throwing my hat back into the ring. I’m not ashamed to admit I need you and your pep talks and your banter. But the ball is in your court now.”

There’s a pregnant pause. “Damn you,” she whispers. “Damn you, Alex.”

Then she hangs up the phone.

*

I’m getting outof the shower a few days later when I hear the doorbell. I’m careful to dry my hair off so I don’t open up the wound still healing on the back of my head. Wrapping the damp towel around my waist, I walk over to the door and look through the peephole.

“Holy shit.”

When I open it, I’m struck speechless. “What the hell are you doing here, Ma?”

The thin woman opens her arms. “Is that any way to greet the woman who birthed you? Why are you half naked? That’s no way to answer the door. I raised you better than that.”

I’m still shocked to see her when she nudges me aside and walks in. “How do you know where I live?” I ask slowly as she enters my apartment and looks around.

She doesn’t answer that. “Oh, Alex. It’s so bleak here. Where are the photos? The décor? It’s so…white. Do you remember all those fun signs we’d find at flea markets? You loved helping your daddy hang them up.”

I must be dreaming. Because Logan’s would have told me they released her, right? They would need some sort of permission or point person to pick her up. There’s no way she’s here in front of me. “I’m hallucinating,” I say aloud, rubbing my eyes.

But the hallucination laughs the same light laugh I’ve heard in the past when she wasn’t spiraling. “No, silly boy. I had to see you. I heard them say you were hurt. And that awful Pam told me you weren’t coming to visiting hours to see me while you recovered. How could I stay there when I knew my baby boy was somewhere in pain? I’ve always been there for you when you were hurt.”

I…have no idea what to say.

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