Page 15 of Fake Dating a Human 101

Cress gagged and Mor bit his lips over a smile. He turned his head away so Cress wouldn’t see it.

“Dranian and I will plan our heist for this evening and give you details within the hour,” Shayne said to Mor as Cress spat the button out. Shayne leaned to see past them and called to Dranian, “You coming?”

Dranian slid off his seat without a word and hastened to the stairs.

“I could use a coffee,” Shayne added as he pushed out the apartment door and led the way down. “I call the good chair by the fireplace—”

Dranian rushed forward, and Shayne sprang after him. They shoved each other, fighting for position at the bottom of the stairs. Dranian nudged Shayne aside with his hip and managed to exit the stairwell first, but in the end Shayne latched onto the back of Dranian’s shirt, yanked it so hard it ripped off, and took the opportunity of Dranian going dead-still in the middle of the café with his rippling abs exposed to spring past him and land in the café’s best chair.

The moon was a heavy bulb lighting the sky, marking the path for four fae assassins in black to infiltrate a highly secure building. The whole escapade made Shayne realize that humans were a rather dumb species. Sneaking inside Desmount Tech was nearly as easy as the walk through the city to reach it. The doors weren’t even locked, and several lights were left on inside as if the fools of Lily’s big secret wereinvitingthe fairies to come spy on them.

An itch arose on Shayne’s back as he headed down a curvy hallway. He twisted his arms this way and that to reach beneath where his crossbow was strapped, never quite finding it, until someone else’s fingers scratched the spot. Shayne released a sigh of relief.

“All that twisting was horrendous to watch. You looked like a writhing hogbeast suffering from worms,” Cress explained as he passed Shayne to peer around the hall’s edge. He mirrored the dangerous killer he once was as he inched his way forward to scout for enemies. Once satisfied, he signalled to the brothers behind him that it was safe to progress, and he slowly drew his glimmering fairsaber. A brief beat of pride moved through Shayne at seeing Cress back in murder-mode after all his time in the human realm. Shayne would rather die by a thousand hot flames than admit it, but Cress had always been the best killer among them. There was nothing quite as terrifying as seeing the coldness in Cress’s eyes when he was entering enemy territory.

A strange sound lifted in the hall as they rounded the corner. Shayne looked back and forth in confusion until Mor said, “Cress, are youhumming?”

The sound stopped.

“No,” Cress said.

Shayne felt a grin form. “Was that the theme song of that spy movie we watched last night? What was that movie called again?” He tapped the side of his head, then he snapped. “A Mission Probable!”

“That wasnotit,” Mor muttered.

“A Mission… Pretend-able?” Shayne guessed again.

“Mission Possible,” Dranian murmured, almost too quiet to hear.

“Ah! Yes, that was it.Mission Possible. Cress, that’s what you were humming, right?” Shayne nudged Cress’s back as they came into a room cloaked in black curtains. “Were you pretending to be that astounding human male who—”

“I don’t need to pretend to be a human, Shayne. I am far more fierce than any human spy…” Cress’s voice trailed off as he flung a black curtain aside and stepped through. Shayne followed and almost walked into Cress, but he spun off to the side, making way for Dranian to bump into Cress’s back instead.

Shayne blinked as blinding lights burned across an enormous space. A few dozen people were quietly moving about, including a small herd of dolled up human females at the far end. Every being was unarmed and seemingly unthreatened by the spies who’d infiltrated their building like the handsome human inMission Possible. Only, unlike in the movie, this place felt safe and cozy and suspiciously cute.

A large banner hung across the wall that read: LAST DATE. LAST HOPE. LAST CHANCE FOR LOVE.

The quietness was interrupted when a female saw the assassins standing there. Her round face lit up and she rushed for them. The speedwalk triggered Cress’s fairsaber to twitch forward, so Shayne grabbed the sword and yanked it from Cress’s hand. He held it behind his back, and Mor silently took the weapon without a word. Shayne pulled off his crossbow and handed that back to Mor, too. A shuffling sound lifted by one of the curtains where Shayne imagined Mor was hiding all the weapons.

“You must be the bachelors forLast Date!” the human female exclaimed. She did a shameless gaze up and down their bodies. Dranian crossed his arms like he was trying to cover himself. “Wow, the recruiting team deserves a raise!” The female giggled and waved them forward. “Come fill out the forms so we can get started filming! Are you excited to learn which resort we’ll be sending you to? Are you excited to meet the ladies?”

Not a single fairy foot moved. Rather, Cress’s cold turquoise gaze—the one Shayne had been proud to see only seconds ago—landed on him with various tones and threats.

“What did she just say?” Cress asked slowly.

Shayne looked around at the décor, at the cameras, at the new people filtering into the large space. He scratched his head. “There’s achance,” he said as he clasped his hands tightly together in front of him, “that we might be in the wrong building.”

A shadowy chill crawled over Shayne’s flesh, making his bones shiver and his limbs prickle with frostbite. He was sure he’d be frozen to the floor by Cress’s ice powers and terrible mood if he wasn’t careful with the next words that came out of his mouth.

“I take back my agreement about the lashings,” Shayne settled on.

“Do you mean to tell me…” Mor said in a way that made Shayne picture him speaking through his teeth “…that we’ve walked onto adatingshow? That these humans think we’reavailablebachelors?”

Cress pinched the bridge of his nose. “Ofcoursethey think we’re the bachelors, Mor. We’re unfathomably gorgeous!”

Shayne accidentally grinned. Dranian nudged him, making him snap out of it and force the smile off his face before Cress or Mor might notice.

Cress turned slowly to face the fairies. He raised a finger and held it mostly in Shayne’s face. “We cannotbe caught trying to spy on Lily,” he stated in sharp, threatening words. “We shall do whatever these humans ask so we blend in. We will not blow our cover—no matter what!”

---