Page 106 of The Dicktionary Club

The sun was beginning to rise, and I wondered what time it was, although I couldn’t bear to look at my phone. I wasn’t ready to deal with any abusive messages from Philip or Andrea quite yet. Instead, I sat on the sofa and pulled a blanket up over my legs.

‘Why did this happen?’ I asked, still trying to make sense of everything.

Zola gently shook her head, looking lost for words. ‘I called Natasha late last night after you fell asleep,’ she eventually said.

‘OK. Tell me.’

Zola took a breath. ‘So, you were right, Ella. Natasha wasupset that day in the gym over Philip.’

My brain flooded back to Natasha crying inconsolably in the middle of David Lloyd’s changing room.

‘But I didn’t know it was because of Philip. She never said!’

Zola nodded. ‘Yeah, I know. None of us did. So, when I gave her access to the website, she read that partial piece you wrote on him before you two properly got together.’

My eyes began streaming as I remembered boasting about how I could write Philip up without even dating him. I hadn’t taken my nasty words off the website. God, I’d been so wrapped up in how good it felt to be with him that uploading to the Dicktionary Club was the last thing on my mind.

‘Why didn’t she just tell him? Why did she have to blurt it out over a fucking mic in front of the whole fucking city?’ I asked, realising it must have been Natasha draped over Philip before she went all Kanye and stole the show up on stage.

‘One of the other girls said she saw Natasha go up to him before it all kicked off last night,’ Zola said, confirming my fears. ‘Apparently, she made a right arse of herself, told him she missed him and asked him to leave with her and everything, but he told her to go away. He said he wasn’t interested. So .?.?.’

I felt myself deflate utterly. They really had been a thing. ‘So, she exposed everything? What the fuck type of person does that, Zola?’ I asked, feeling the anger build up inside me.

‘A bitter one!’ Zola sighed. ‘But .?.?. she was hurt, babe. And she’s young. I’m not even sure if she knew you and him were properly together.’

I let my tired, achy body sink into Katy’s grubby couch and stared into space.What the hell must Philip think of me?How could I even start to explain all of this?

‘I’ll put the kettle on,’ Zola said, and she headed through to Katy’s kitchen while I continued to replay everything in my head, over and over again, from Alexander’s face to Andrea yellingabout what a disappointment I was, to Philip striding off into the distance. That was undoubtably the worst part.

‘Oh my freakin’ God!’ Katy burst through into the living room with half her tit dangling out of a tank top and her hair still backcombed, looking like she’d just stepped out of a cheap porno movie.

‘What is it?’ I sat up, turning to her.

Zola walked through, carrying two cups of tea. ‘I’ve seen it all before, babes,’ she said with a nod at Katy’s boobs.

‘It’s all over the news!’ Katy gasped, turning her phone around and making herself slightly more decent at the same time.

‘What? What is?’ I covered my mouth, hoping this was a weird prank and Ashton was ready to burst through Katy’s door at any moment.

‘The Dicktionary Club, and .?.?.’ Katy lowered her voice, ‘Philip!’

I felt dizzy and flustered, like I was going to pass out.

‘Let me see,’ Zola insisted, setting down the mugs haphazardly and grabbing Katy’s phone. ‘Millionaire Playboy Philip Khan Gets Played!’ she read aloud. The three of us exchanged worried glances.

‘Last night,Scottish businessman Philip Khan was the first to be exposed publicly on new website the Dicktionary Club, which reviews men on dating sites. PR company Smart Reputations formulated the website, allowing previous lovers to give honest feedback on men currently dating in Glasgow. The website aims to reveal how potential suitors have previously treated women,allowing users to vet their dates before taking the plunge. Khan was called out publicly at the launch of Alexander Cambi’s exclusive art exhibition at Kelvingrove Art Gallery, and identified as one of the men featured on the website. We have reached out to Khan’srepresentatives for comment.’

Zola finished reading and glanced up. ‘Well, at least it didn’t name us personally, right?’

Katy let out a small cackle. ‘And Andrea is getting the blame!’

‘Or the credit,’ I added. ‘That makes us sound like the good guys. But we’re fucking not.’ I held my hands against my face in total panic all over again.

Zola rummaged under Katy’s coffee table, pulled out her computer and let her fingers fly over the keyboard. We sat in silence, each trying to comprehend the situation.

‘Holy fuck!’ Zola exclaimed.

‘What?’ Katy moaned.

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