Page 58 of The Dicktionary Club

‘Alexander’s focus will be on showcasing and selling his paintings,’ I continued, ‘but one lucky guest can bid to win a unique commission. When that happens, they’ll book in with him to paint a loved one or have a self-portrait done. So, I’m going to build the advertising campaign around that.’

‘Wow! So, someone wants to buy a giant portrait of themselves? I didn’t think anyone would do that these days!’ He sounded shocked. ‘To what? Hang above their fireplace?’

‘Yeah, I guess. But it doesn’t have to be of themselves, maybe people want one of their kids or something. Their dog even.Basically, the auction winner will email him the image they would like painted, and he’ll recreate it with his style. It’s an unbelievable prize, Philip. His paintings sell for two hundred grand a pop.’

‘I suppose if it’s good enough for King Charlie!’ Philip laughed.

‘Exactly!’

‘Surely your usual influencer market would enjoy that type of thing? You’re creating a unique experience and girls love these big royal events nowadays, don’t they? To plaster all over TikTok and Instagram, that type of thing.’

I gasped as an idea struck me.

‘Ella?’

I was silent as the idea expanded and clarified in my head. This could be brilliant.

‘Is everything all right?’ Philip asked.

‘Pleasesssshjust now,’ I said and closed my eyes to concentrate. Finally, after weeks of stalling and uncertainty, my brain had clicked into action.

When I opened my eyes again, I noticed Philip had stopped the car at a bus stop near the city centre and was gazing over at me curiously.

‘Fuck. I’m so sorry, Philip. But I think I have to go!’

‘What?’ he said.

‘I know I sound crazy, but I’ve just had a great idea for this exhibition, which I have to work on straight away.’ I felt my jaw tense. I didn’t care what he thought of me right now, I just knew that I had to work.

‘Like, right now?’ He seemed a little confused, but also entertained at my impulsiveness.

My legs were bouncing up and down, full of the thrill of this new idea. I nodded back at him, eager to get started.

‘Well, yes, of course you can go. You’re not a hostage. I candrop you.Errr.?.?. Will I take you home?’ he asked, starting up the engine again.

‘Erm .?.?. no. Back to the office, please,’ I replied, feeling the adrenaline pulse through my body. This was it – I was finally ready to nail this project.

Philip swung around and began driving towards Smart Reputations. I sat back with my eyes tightly closed again, holding my head in my hands, piecing everything together in my mind. A few minutes later, I felt a tap on my shoulder.

‘You have arrived at your destination, Ella.’

I immediately pressed down on my seat belt and smiled gratefully. ‘I’m so sorry about this. I honestly am. But if I don’t work on this right now, I might simply lose it all from my brain. I’ve been waiting a month for this moment to happen.’

He let out a chuckle, baffled and delighted at the same time. ‘Go! Seriously. Can I help?’

I shook my head. ‘You’ve helped, trust me.’ I opened the car door and swung my legs out, saying, ‘Thanks for this. I promise I owe you big time!’

‘Yep, certainly the most intriguing girl I’ve ever met,’ Philip mumbled under his breath.

I smiled at him and shut the door, then watched as he drove off.

I unlocked the door of the office, entered the dark building, switching on all of the lights and heading to my station. The Smart Reputations floor felt strange at night. I had only been in a few times before when I had forgotten my purse or bank card, but I’d never come back to actually work. It felt eerily quiet, without my friends chipping in or slipping me their sarcastic comments and gossipy updates. I sat at my desk and pulled off my shoes to get comfortable, then grabbed some paper and pens from my drawer. I loaded up my desktop, desperate to get cracking, my mind and body still thrilled by what I’d come upwith.

I started by researching Alexander’s most famous art pieces and studied them intently. His primary focus was on traditional portraits, which were so realistically done that they almost looked like photographs, with the exception of the bright primary colours he liked to use. Alexander changed the skin colours and features of his portrait sitters with a unique, hyper-real brightness, making his work completely distinctive and sought after. In his earlier days, he’d painted landscapes and briefly had a spell as a street artist, doing fancy murals and public commissions. But his portraits seemed to be the most recognised and celebrated of his works. Most of Alexander’s collectors were wealthy international businesspeople, but he had painted a duke and duchess before, and I knew that one of his most recent pieces was hung at Balmoral.

I began creating a mood board, focusing on reds and golds. I sat for hours scribbling, making detailed notes on exactly how I wanted everything to be at the exhibition, from the décor to the floral arrangements to the music. I even thought about what canapés and drinks we could serve to match the vibe. I could work wonders with Alexander’s ten grand budget now that, miraculously, I didn’t have to pay for a venue. Not only that, I actually had the most gorgeous art venue in the country. I then opened my laptop and created template invitations for the guest list beyond the press people I’d already alerted. I was sure Zola could probably do a better job, but the adrenaline was still pushing through my veins and I wanted to map it all out while my creative streak was alive.

It was 2 a.m. when I finally I sat back, with a solid plan mapped out. I, Ella Banks, was about to throw the best art exhibition this city had ever seen.

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