Page 10 of Finlay

Fuckers had yet to allow me my claymore indoors. You scratchedonepainting and they held it against you forever.

“I’m going to make changes,” I said, meeting the gaze of each of my circle.

“Like what?” Logan ducked Calan’s next swat, using the straw from his drink to point at him. “Do that again, and I’m gonna put this straw somewhere the sun doesn’t shine.”

Calan’s growl slipped free. “I’d like to see ye try.”

I sighed. “Can you two take it outside please?”

“Come on, Logan.” Evan opened the door and jerked his head. “We need to do a perimeter check anyway.”

“Boring,” Logan said in a singsong voice. “I’d much rather go a few rounds with Mr. Grumpy Pants here.”

A vein popped in Calan’s temple. I estimated Logan was one more word away from getting his throat ripped out. Not really an issue, given our healing, but it’d leave a hell of a mess to clean up. “Logan, go. Now.”

I didn’t have the alpha bark that Danny did, but I didn’t need it. Logan respected me enough to know when to obey. Waving imperiously at Calan, he slipped from the room after Evan, leaving me alone with my brother.

“Little shit,” Calan muttered, dropping into a chair. “He always knows how to get under my skin.”

“He’s exceptional at it with most people.” I took my seat with a sigh. “Yer right though, I need to stop burying myself in work.”

“What are you so afraid of?” Calan asked curiously. “If you step outside the clan, what are you scared of finding?”

I stared down at my hands, wondering how honest to be with him. I’d never opened up to him about Sarah, or any of that. He knew. Of course he did. But that was because Calan knew me better than I knew myself.

“Everything,” I whispered, cracking the door open a little. “I’m afraid of finding everything.”

Chapter 3

Finn

As much as I wanted to just hide away for the rest of the day, I knew the others were right. It wasn’t healthy. Maybe if I did something, this day wouldn’t drag on endlessly. I could’ve shifted, but then if I ended up somewhere, I wouldn’t have any clothes to change into.Unless I carried them with me, of course, but even that felt like too much effort today.

Instead, I got into my car, driving aimlessly. I let my thoughts drift as I followed the winding roads, my superior instincts meaning I barely needed to pay attention.

Which was good, because I wasn’t sure I could have, even if I needed to. My mind was too full of my conversation with my brother. The hushed word I’d confided in him.

“Everything.”

That was what Danny had. He had everything he’d ever hoped for. There was nothing to say I couldn’t have it too.

I just had to be brave enough to open myself up for it.

Today wasn’t the day for it though. Today was for Sarah. For Maria. For the lives they hadn’t got to live.

I didn’t go near the cabin they’d called home. I neverdid, especially on this day. It was the only time of year that Danny returned to the clan lands. He’d stay there from sunrise to sunset, drowning his sorrows in a bottle.

The guilt I’d felt over leaving him to suffer alone used to choke me, but it was the one step I couldn’t take.Comforting Danny…being strong for him on this day over all others…

I couldn’t do it. My own grief was too inescapable to hide. I couldn’t hold it together, not on the anniversary. Not in the place they’d died.

Not even for Danny.

I’d hated myself for it for a long time, knowing he was there. Alone. Then, out of the blue, someone had joined him. A human.

Riley.

Before they were mates, they were friends. Best friends, from what I could tell. Close enough that Riley knew something was wrong. That the place Danny disappeared to every September was one of darkness and suffering.

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