Page 2 of Finlay

They were both Danny’s.

I’d never begrudged Danny having the clan, and I didn’t begrudge him the family he had either. I loved Danny like he was my own brother, and his happiness came before my own. Always. I just wished my heart didn’t ache every time Sarah smiled at me. That the crack didn’t deepen every timeMaria reached up for me to hold her. That I could show them the kind of love I wanted to, rather than the kind I had to.

But that was on me, not them. They had not asked for me to have these feelings any more than I had.

So long as no one noticed that I sometimes looked at Sarah the same way she looked at Danny, everything would be fine.

There was no denying that my love was entirely one sided. If my own feelings weren’t involved, I would have said that Danny and Sarah’s love was a beautiful thing to witness. They had found a happiness together that eluded most. It had given the single members of the clan hope that they would one day find it too. That their person was out there for them.

Everyone except me, of course. I knew my perfect person existed.

It was just that she was married to someone else.

I had come to terms with it. I had no other choice. Even if Danny had not been my alpha, my leader, my best friend, I would never interfere in someone’s relationship in that way. It was my secret. My shame. The knowledge I carried deep inside, never letting anyone else see.

No one other than Calan.

He had been the one to find me on their wedding night. I had stood at the altar, watching the woman I loved walk towards me.

And exchange vows with another man.

That night was the one time I had allowed myself to crack.

I had made it through the ceremony. Even the celebration that followed. I had smiled, given toasts, and hugged them both. I had wished them every happiness.

I had meant it too. It was not their fault that it came at the expense of my own.

I held it together until they retreated to their cabin.

Then, I ran.

I did not shift.

No, for this I needed to stay in my human form. I wanted to feel the pain everywhere else. Dragging at my lungs. In the soles of my feet. The burn of my muscles.

Perhaps then, the pain in my human heart would be a little easier to bear.

Miles and miles passed, but it did not help.

Nothing would.

I ran without pausing, not paying any attention to where I was going. It was only when I reached a large body of water that I skidded to a halt.

Loch Bunachton.A place I was very familiar with.

It was where Danny, Calan, Logan, and I had learned to swim.Where we had spent countless days playing together.Somewhere that had always felt like home to me. Almost as much as the clan lands did.

Had my instincts led me here? Did my brain want to remind me of what Danny was to me? Of all the happy memories we had shared?

I had no idea, but I collapsed on the shore, finally giving in.

That was where Calan found me, an hour later. I did not know if he had tracked me as his wolf, or if he knew this was where I would come.

I did not ask either.

I did not so much as acknowledge his presence as he dropped beside me. As he silently handed me a bottle of Adamanthea, the only substance capable of getting us inebriated.

He sat beside me, not saying a word. But the message was clear.