Page 14 of Best Friends, Tennessee

“You going to fucking relax?”

I met his eyes. For some reason I couldn’t stop glancing at his lips, seeing them so close to my face. A flash of memory hit me: one afternoon, in high school, I’d been walking alone in the hallway between classes and I’d overheard Natalie Brown talking to her best friend in a hushed tone. I knew that Finn had visited her house the night before.“He’s a really good kisser,” Natalie had said to her friend.“Honestly, I could like, only make out with him for the rest of my life and be happy. His tongue…”

I snapped back to the present moment, blinking and trying to shift underneath his arm. A warmth spread below my belly button, dropping a little lower.

The sound of another Dolly Parton song came through the air and people started singing along and laughing in the main area of the bar.

“Forgot you just want to fight all the time,” I murmured.

“I don’t fight anyone other than you,” he said. “And you started it. Think you’re aware of that.”

Yeah. I guess I did.

Sometimes this was the only way we could communicate, back when we were forced to live together senior year. After getting physical, both of us could chill out, split up, and eat together at the dinner table—nice and civil again.

“Get off me,” I said. “I wasn’t trying to shove you that hard, and you know it. It was an accident.”

He hummed. “You are stronger than you used to be, though,” he said.

Finally, all at once, he let me go, his forearm brushing over my chest as he released me.

I fixed my jacket. When I looked back at him I saw that he had gold glitter all across his arm and chest now, too.

I smiled at him and then a smile spread over his face, too. He shook his head.

“Like old times,” I said, stretching my neck.

“Why fight me when you could just come dance?” he protested.

“I’ll dance with you, darlin,” a woman’s voice called out from behind us. We turned to see a brunette in a red dress, coming up behind Finn. She was drop-dead gorgeous and she looked at Finn like she wanted him to knock her up with triplets tonight.

“Evening,” Finn said to her with a nod, quickly going back into total gentleman mode.

“Going to freshen up, then I want to join you out on the dance floor,” she said to Finn. As she walked by, she dragged her manicured nails across his chest, smiling at him.

She disappeared into the restroom, leaving a light floral perfume scent in the air.

“If you bring her home tonight,” I told Finn, “you better fuckquietly. That’s all I’m saying.”

Finn rolled his eyes. “She seems fun, but I’m not an asshole. I’m not bringing her home on your first night here.”

I pulled in a breath. “Up to you, big boy. I’m going to go take a piss.”

When I came back out from the restroom they were already out on the dance floor, hand in hand.

That was something that would never change. Finn got a lot of attention.

I used to be jealous. Not of the girls, necessarily, but of the amount of time he spent with them in high school. I wanted good things for him, so I never said it out loud. But I noticed how our time together dwindled, the moment high school started. I didn’twant to demand more of his time, but instead, I created an ever-growing rift between us byneverasking for more time with him.

I’d been too afraid.

And that rift was still here today.

I wasn’tjealousof the attention Finn got anymore. I was proud. But he still didn’t seem to notice how easy it was for him to be well-liked. Something I’d never had.

But does a fish know it's in water? Finn had always been liked, so he barely even noticed it.

It was a whole lot harder for me to find attention fromguysin Bestens. It had been easy in LA, but even the guys in small-town Tennessee who were gay tended to be ranchers, cowboys, and, well… guys like Finn, but less straight.

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