Page 82 of Hot Ice, Tennessee

I fucking hated having a secret. Like I was trapped, moving from one kind of secret to the next, holding it all in to protect other people. Mason was out and proud, but I knew he was terrified of telling Kane what we’d been doing.

I was in limbo. Purgatory. Another cage of my own making, because I kept thinking with my cock instead of my brain.

And because,goddamnit, I was starting to realize how much I actually liked him.

I swallowed hard. “It’s nothing. I’m okay.”

“No it isn’t. What’s on your mind? I told you I’ve got at least five minutes—”

“It’s just hard seeing Elliot around the frat house,” I said, which was at least partially true.

“The asshole. Well, you are always welcome to come stay at my house.”

“I like being on campus. I can handle it, and it’s only one more year. I was just… having a moment.”

“Why was Elliot being a prick?”

I sucked in a breath of air, looking over at the moonlight coming in through my window. “Because he found out I have a crush on someone new.”

“Oh,” Kane said simply.

He didn’t push. Didn’t pry.

But I still felt like my heart was teetering on a ledge, and all of this felt like toomuch.

“Well, that’s good. As long as the new guy has zero in common with Elliot’s sorry ass.”

I puffed out a laugh. “He’s nothing like Elliot.”

“Excellent.”

I felt like a weight was being lifted from me, piece by piece.

I was telling my brother the truth. Even if it wasn’t in great, shining detail.

“I’d say he’s better than Elliot in just about every conceivable way,” I said. “He’s older. Better looking. Doesn’t give me sudden urges to crawl into a cave and never look back.”

“Just make sure you’re still putting yourself first. Prioritizing what you need. I never want you to feel as isolated as you were over the past few years.”

“God, me either,” I said. “And… I’m trying to lethimprioritize himself, too.”

“Good.”

I sighed. “I was afraid you’d chew me out for having a crush at all.”

“No,” he mused. “Well, only if he treats you badly. Jesse, I know I’ve told you this before, but I never wantusto be how we were, either.”

I swallowed. “I fucking hated not being able to talk to you. Never again.”

“Damn right.”

I felt like my heart was spinning. “I don’t think anything serious is going to happen with this guy, but it just feels good. To have a guy actually want me, instead of using me.”

He does want me, right?

“Yeah,” I heard Kane yell at someone in the bar. “Two cases? Got it. I’ll be up in a sec. Jesse? Hey.”

“Hey. You can head back in now. But thank you for talking me down from the world’s stupidest little cliff.”