Page 65 of Exrated

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My heart is thumping in my chest, adrenaline buzzing over my skin. I feel like a raging bitch, but it’s a defense mechanism. If I’m nice, if I give him any leeway, I will give into him, and I can’t let myself do that. Do I want to fuck him? God yes I do, but my heart can’t take that.

I exhale as I stare out over downtown LA. We’re on the 47thfloor of some high-rise. Hud rented out this luxurious apartment to play CEO in some porn rip off ofFifty Shades of Grey. The city looks so dingy and filthy from way up here, something you don’t really realize when you’re down on the sidewalks. A blanket of smog hangs over the distant horizon. And I think maybe this is what my fucking life is like, LA. I don’t see how repulsive my life looks to someone way up here in an ivory tower, I just see it from street level. Fuck her for making me question myself. I turn away from the window and catch Hudson dragging some lighting across the floor.

He positions the lamp at the foot of the wrought iron bed then looks over his shoulder at me. “That should do. Oh, by the way, two guys called in sick, so I had to pull Jemma to help out. If it’s gonna be an issue, go ahead and pop a Viagra.”

“Fucking great,” I groan, digging the pill bottle out of my pocket and popping the top. I plop a pill in my mouth and swallow as I turn back to the window.

A few minutes later the bell rings. I lean my forearm against the glass and keep staring out at the representation of my fucking life at the moment. The tap of her heels over the hardwoods echoes from the tall ceilings.

“Sorry I was late,” she says. “Traffic was a bitch.”

“No problem. Can you go grab the reflectors over there, chicken?”

“Sure,” Jemma says.

When I turn around, Hud’s got his phone to his ear. “Whereareyou?” he says. “The…” His palm slaps across his face, and he shakes his head. “No, I didn’t get the message. This is fucking great. What the hell am I gonna do now?” He pauses, his eyes rising to meet mine. “Fine. Fine. Call me when you’re better.” He tucks his phone into his pocket then throws his hands up.

“Brandi’s got the fucking flu now too.” An agitated groan rumbles from his chest. “Do you have any idea what I had to pay to rent this apartment? Jesus Christ.” He wipes his hands down his face and shakes his head. “This is such shit.”

There’s a loud thud when Jemma drops one of the reflectors. Hud and I both watch as she bends over to pick it up.Fuck her ass looks good.

“Oh, shit.” His gaze drifts from her to me and then a sick smile twists his face.

“Oh, fuck no!” I say, shaking my head because I know what he’s thinking. “No way, Hud.”

He ignores me. “Jemma, doll, sweetheart…you want to make some extra money?”

I stalk across the room toward them. “Hell to the fuck no!” I shout.

Her attention directs to me, her eyes narrowing into a glare. “Oh, really?”

“Jemma, no.”

Cocking her hip to the side, she crosses her arms over her chest and arches a single brow. “And who the hell are you to tell me what to do?” She smiles.

“Johnny,” Hudson says, stepping between us. “Chill the fuck out, would you? Somebody’s fucking someone because I paid too much for this place to not get a scene.”

Benson walks in with a cigarette between his lips and Jemma goes into a laughing fit. “Why don’t you get the two of them to do it?” she points at Benson and me.

Benson takes a drag, shrugging as he blows a thick cloud of smoke between his lips.

“I’m not fucking you,” I say.

“Yeah, I know,” he says. “I’d be fucking you.”

My initial instinct is to punch him in the face, but I don’t. “It’s in my contract I don’t do guy on guy.”

Jemma’s laughing so hard she has to lean over her knees to catch a breath.

“No anal,” Hud says, “but what about a little oral?”

“No.”

“Handjob?”

“Fuck no!”

“Jesus Christ!” He pulls his phone from his pocket and dials a number. “Benson, if I can get Ricardo up here, you’re fucking him in the ass, okay?”